Jump to content

How to go from "friends" to "dating"?


Recommended Posts

Hi, I'm looking for some advice.


I've been getting close to girl I know for a few months now. It seems to grow better the more time we spend with each other. Recently we have been hanging out alone and had a good time. We've never been on a "date" but have been hanging out together.


I like this girl as more than friends. I know for sure that she likes me as she enjoys spending time with me and has fun with me. I also know she is physically attracted to me.


How do I go about becoming "more than friends" with this girl?


Do I ask her on a "date" instead of just arranging to meet up?


Do I try to kiss her?


Do I tell her how I feel?


Any advice would be great, thanks. We are both 26 years old.



Link to comment

Yes....ask her out on a "proper date". Just hanging out at your place takes no effort on your part. Not exactly a way to make a girl feel special....


You don;t have to tell her how you feel per say. Maybe you could tell her she is the type of girl you like to date..and ask her if that would feel weird for her.

Chances are she is feeling the same way you are. This will clear things up.

Link to comment

I would ask her out to something, but would not define it as a date. It would make it something that might be a date or might not. In such a case, dinner is probably out. An activity would be very good. Something that invovled the two of you having fun together would be excellent. And while doing that activity, I'd bust a move.


Before I did all this, I'd make darn sure I had readup on body langauge and paid attention to hers.

Link to comment

Like the rest said, ask her out. Quit stallin' or you'll loose your chance. And, like the rest said, don't tell her it's a date. Do things as if you where dating her. Forget she's your friend. Of course, the friendship is never going to be the same, but if you don't take that risk, you'll never know if it could have been something more.


David DeAngelo developed a "Kiss Test" to find out if a girl is ready to be kissed. When the mood is right, start stroking the tips of her hair for a couple seconds. If she doesn't do anything to stop you, then you know she likes it. So grab deeper into the hair, gently... gently... If she likes this you know she's ready to be kissed. If it fails, then stop and wait for another moment. There'll be others, don't stress out.


She might be uncomfortable with the idea of dating you, but if you SHOW her (NOT TELL HER) you no longer have an interest in friendship, and that you have confidence, she'll HAVE to choose between friendship or something more.


Besides you say she likes you right? It's down hill from there.

Link to comment

If you guys drink then get some alcohol happening - that way you can always claim that you got kinda carried away or something. If you don't drink then blame the moonlight, the dancing, the music whatever. Hell, just tell her that she was so irresistiable there under the street lamp that you couldn't resist kissing her, tell her you just couldn't help yourself.

She's got to be flattered at least. Tell her also that you don't want to ruin your friendship.

[only say these things if they are actually true though]


Don't ask her out on a date, it's pointless now...


Brace yourself for if it isn't welcome - plan an exit strategy to keep pride and friendship in tact.


I'm not one to encourage alcohol abuse (or moonlight/dancing etc) but it's something that has often worked for me.


It is possible that she is wondering what on earth is going on with you...


What "man" said on the above posting is spot on - do it or regret it!!!

Link to comment

Thanks for the replies.


So the concensus is that I should make a move next time we go out. And that it doesn't matter whether I explicitly use the word "date" as they are the same thing anyway.


She emailed me again saying we should hang out again soon. I know she likes me (others have also pointed this out) and I feel she is waiting for me to take it forward.


I'm going to take her for out in town centre, then for a meal, and then to a bar afterwards.


So I should just try and kiss her next time we go out?

Link to comment

I always liked as a safe manuver what I called the "hand bump." Your hands touches her and then moves away from her hand. See what happens, try to touch her hand again in a few moments. Repeat. If the contact is allowed repeatedly, it should also get longer, and you are both asking the same question and giving the same answer, so, maintain the contact, and hold her hand.


And then, as suggested by LostInMyThoughts, you should look into her eyes and kiss her.

Link to comment



I found out she has been "casually" seeing someone. I don't think it's serious yet - but I do still think she definitely likes me.


My feelings on this from things she says and things other people have said, is that she was feeling quite lonely and not getting much male attention, and maybe she is just with this guy casually for some male company. Does this sounds plausible? (If only I'd realised my feelings sooner and taken the chance eh..)


I think the next time we hang out I'm going to ask her how serious she is about this other guy, and depending on her reply I'm going to ask her out on a "proper date".


Any other suggestions on this?

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Create New...