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Well she texts me last night.........

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Day 24 of NC and I freaking wake up to a text at 1am this morning. I thought it was a dream till I woke up for work and read the text. After finally doing alright for a few days there she is to throw me for another loop. The text just said "hey", that was it but I never responded. I don't know if I should or not. What the heck. O heres a link to the original post if you care........thread

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NC on your part is really hard especially when the other person involved decides to contact you. Your first reaction is to want to contact them back.


I don't think you should. Because then it's giving her that sense of enjoyment. Knowing that you will respond and knowing that she may not.



No do not respond at all I am on day 1 of NC keep on looking at my phone but I ain't going to text him. If you reply and she don't then your gonna be thinking why she ain't and will just end up back at square one.


I very much agree with misspiggyfire.

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NO, do not respond, you did the right thing by letting it go.. these late night texts from the ex are usually a result of thier own "curiosity" needing to be "alleviated" and then once they hear back from you, they put the "wall of break up right back in place" and you are left with your heart and head spinning... so no need to put yourself into that 'emotional turmoil".


If the ex does not clearly state an emotionally intentional effort to ask you to "get together because they want to "try again".. then no casual texts, emails, im's, myspace etc, need to be replied to... let it be.. let her live with the consequence of the break up, and if she ever intentionally wants to "try again" trust me she will be "very clear" about that.. otherwise, she's just texting during a momentary urge to "keep tabs on you, and make sure you're "just there". She lost the privlage of knowing this, once the relationship was over... so good for you for not responding..


Feel empowerd for today that she made the last "contact attempt" and be proud of yourself for setting some standards and value on for your own heart by NOT responding....

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i got two emails yesterday from the ex. one asking if I had paid her car resgistration, and that he'd mail me a check if I had. the next email, immediately after, said "disregard the last email. I checked my back account, and I did pay it." well, I disregarded both emails. first of all, why would i pay for her vehicle registration, and second, if i had paid it, I'd have told her. The emails were nothing more than a BS ploy, i feel to get me to respond. why would she want me to respond to that? I don't know, but i've stopped asking why. games, my friend, games. sometimes people play them, and don't even know they're doing it. sometimes a person knows full well.

my speculation is that she sent the second email asking to disregard because she saw her error. that it's dumb. why she sent the first one, who knows. fishing.

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Day 24 of NC and I freaking wake up to a text at 1am this morning. I thought it was a dream till I woke up for work and read the text. After finally doing alright for a few days there she is to throw me for another loop. The text just said "hey", that was it but I never responded. I don't know if I should or not. What the heck. O heres a link to the original post if you care........thread


Hey man, for me it was last monday on day 18 of NC... I woke up at 9:30 and picked up my phone just as she texted me, that she "didn't want to bother me" but hoped i had an enjoyable thanksgiving.... Hold strong. Don't reply.


I actually ended up bumping into her last friday, day 22, walking by on the street while with a friend. Smiled, said hey, and kept on going... Be strong.

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you said you want to "know what she wants"... well if "she wanted" to try again as a couple she will clearly state and show the effort and intention to do so.. until then do not respond to any attempts of contact..


sometimes the ex just has moments of "curiosity, guilt, control" and once it is "alleviated" by your response, they are just fine, and go on thier merry way, and you are back to square one in your own healing.


For now there is no reason to respond, she actually said "disregard my last email". So for right now that is what she "wants".


If she wants something "more" from you or for you both, then wait for her to have the time and space to "discover any authentic" feelings.. believe me when the "love is authentic, mature, respectful" nothing will stop the ex from saying so...


You're doing great, try not to read between the lines of her texts, or emails.. just take them for what they are: "mixed signals".. and for now you are too vulnerable to risk responding to "mixed signals"... crumbs, I like to call them..


crumbs that only leave you more hungry if you dare to taste... so try not to be tempted by crumbs.. wait for the "whole cake"...from her, or from anyone whom you choose to give your energy and precious heart to...


Hang in there, no contact is best for now, because self respect has major rewards in life.. you will feel better about yourself, and other like minded people will be attracted to your self respect and confidence... and who knows maybe even the ex will rise to the occasion... until then, or either way, it's time to take care of you.

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I got a Happy Turkey Day and then 2 days later late night asking me

where a street is in my city that she could look up on mapquest or better yet

when she went to work the next day ask someone as she works in my city...




So sick of the crap texts meaning nothing...

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Four months is not that long, and it's a sign of your quality of character that you still have feelings, but from now on put this "energy" into yourself, and you will find you will soon "attract" plenty of wonderful women, and you will be that much wiser this time, more understanding of yourself.. and sure you miss the ex, that's a painful hurdle, but it's the "resistance" to letting go that causes so much of the heartache, it's with THE CHOICE of 'acceptance' that we begin to heal...

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So I have been thinking about this and I feel horrible that I never replied. I have been doing really bad lately and thinking too much but I can't seem to stop. I have been strong with my NC but I feel like I could break at any time and I am trying so hard not to. Do you think that this text meant she was thinking about me or just wanted to toy with me? Why would she send the text after I never replied to her email saying sorry for hating her.


I haven't heard anything more from her since the text and I am afraid I may never again unless I initiate contact. I know that I need to give her space to miss me and I don't think a month of NC is long enough but I don't want her to forget about me. Since the breakup she has wanted to remain friends but I told her that I couldn't because I have feelings for her still and it wouldn't be right. The day she broke up with me I deleted her from my friends on myspace so she couldn't leave comments on my page. She tried to send me another friend request a month after we broke up but I never accepted because I still didn't think it would be right till i got an answer from her regarding us. Well a week after that she mad her profile private so only her friends can view it.


I really don't want this girl to think I hate her because I don't . I was the one who made the mistake of not opening my eyes before it was too late and realized how much I enjoyed her in my life. It just upset me that she couldn't talk to me before cutting me off. Maybe if she did I could have realized what was happening.


I have made so many changes since we broke up, and I truly want to tell this girl that I am sorry for ever toying with her emotions and not being available, and that I am not the same person that she broke up with. That I really do care about her and that I still want her to be a part of my life. The problem is that I kinda already told her that I wanted her in my life about 6 weeks after the breakup and never got an answer just a quick visit before going NC again. I feel like we need to have some sort of communication and I was thinking of sending something like this.........


"hey xxxxx how have you been lately? I know we haven't talked for a few but I just wanted to give you a quick shout to see how things are going and tell you that I don't hate you, I never have. Back in August my head was a mess and I may have came off that way but I truly never wanted you to think you were hated and never wanted you to leave. I want to apologize for any games that I may have played with your emotions, it was never my intent.


I sent you a friend request and hope maybe you can accept and we can start over as friends with no pressure. We are both grown up and should still be able to talk and laugh together. Anyways maybe I will hear from you later, if not Happy Holidays and Happy New Year."


Should I send that or should I call her? I feel the email will be easier that getting rejected on the phone or not getting in touch with her on the phone. But I feel that the email may be too much and the easy way out. Let me know what you think. I want to atleast send a merry xmas text on xmas but also want to try and get some sort of info. Thanks.

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You are trying to convince yourself that it COULD be possibly ok if you contact her.



Who cares about MYSPACE...?? BIG DEAL...



Your TRUE friends have NOTHING to do with a website..



You keep sticking to your guns...It will get better...I promise you.





Your friend,




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