maynards_razorblade69 Posted December 1, 2006 Share Posted December 1, 2006 My boyfriend tells me he's gay, he's slept with three of my best friends and doesn't love me anymore. This was 17 days ago. I saw him today for the first time and he's going out with a man, wearing an "I love you" ring and looking really happy with his life. I feel so awful. So depressed. I don't know what to do, my life feels so worthless without him. Tonight I'm going out with some friends clubbing, to try and have some fun, but I still feel awful. Anything I can do? Link to comment
Beec Posted December 1, 2006 Share Posted December 1, 2006 Specifically, the only things I can tell you are to remian busy and try to keep you mind off of him. He was not the right guy for you, and he obviouosly deceived you about how he felt. It will get better. YOU WILL FIND BETTER. Link to comment
rose2summer Posted December 1, 2006 Share Posted December 1, 2006 Hey May- I am sorry you had to go through this ideal. I cannot even imagine how it feels for your SO to change orientations on you. What you need to realize is that it has nothing to do with you, you are a wonderful woman I am sure, I guess he just didn't realize his preferences before. However, his sleeping with your friends is completely unacceptable. You deserve far better than that and he is really not the kind of man you want in your life. I have seen this happen before, where a guy is with a woman and he realizes he is gay, but the woman is so beautiful and sweet, it had nothing to do with her, but he had some life-altering experience and discovered who he really was. Please remind yourself that it has nothing to do with you. We are here to support you along the way. Hugs, Rose Link to comment
laboheme Posted December 1, 2006 Share Posted December 1, 2006 Rose makes a good point about this having nothing to do with you (well, oftentimes breakups don't in general). Look at it this way: because you now know that he's gay, you don't have to deal with what so many of us go through and harbor hopes for reconciliation. And it's a good thing that you don't! I must admit that I wished several times that my ex had dumped me because he realized he was gay...I just feel that would give somebody a good sense of closure. Absolutely try and have fun tonight, get your mind off of things...and keep busy in general! Link to comment
Clementine orange Posted December 1, 2006 Share Posted December 1, 2006 . YOU WILL FIND BETTER. It's not "better" she needs, it's hetrosexual! Maynards, it probably wasn't an easy decision for him to make or to face the realization of his orientation. However, it is important for people to be true to themselves and what they are. Hang in there, and try not to take it personally Link to comment
maynards_razorblade69 Posted December 1, 2006 Author Share Posted December 1, 2006 Thanks everyone, The thing is, about a year ago he decided he way gay, and then he was straight again...now suddenly he's gay again and I still harbour hopes for reconciliation! Even though he's gay!! I saw him today and it really hurt. I hated him for being so cool about it! Silly really. But I do love him, and I need to get over him. He's an arrogant loser anyway, I know that, he really does believe he's fabulous, when he's stuck in a dead-end job going no where. Still...I do love him very much regardless of what he is. I'm going to have fun and find myself a nice, heterosexual man that will appreciate me, because I don't think I'm a bad person. Link to comment
Beec Posted December 1, 2006 Share Posted December 1, 2006 It's not "better" she needs, it's hetrosexual! She needs both heterosexual and someone who is better, for example someone not an "arrogant loser." Link to comment
Luck of the Irish Posted December 1, 2006 Share Posted December 1, 2006 That's a good thing he came out of the closet. Now you can find a real man. Link to comment
redandblack Posted December 1, 2006 Share Posted December 1, 2006 Just try to ignore him - he wasn't good for you. At least there is no hope for getting back together, so you can let him go easier. It'll get better in time. That's a good thing he came out of the closet. Now you can find a real man. Classy. Link to comment
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