what to do

[renaissancewoman101]

Hey, if you see a friend less and less because they are busier, how do you rectify that if you want to hang out with them more? How do you approach it so that they will hang out with you more. I made a new friend in the last few months (from school) and, at first, we hung out a lot, but now we rarely hang out. I miss her company and want to hang out as much as we used to. I dont know how to approach this. She says she's gotten busier.

 

I dont wanna seem clingy, but I also miss her company.

[honeyspur]

Well, clearly you need to be direct and be prepared for a brush off or a rejection. There is no reason to be subtle if genuine friendship is what you want.

Nothing wrong with : "This is hard for me to say, but I would like to hang out more but get the feeling something's wrong? Have I put you off somehow?"

 

Or, you could try asking if you could join her on whatever activity she's involved in (family, kids, shopping, studying, sports) - even if she's just cleaning the house or walking a dog.

 

Finally, if she's just trying to avoid getting close, it's probably not really about you and she may be going through hard times and doesn't have room for intimate friends. That is sad, because you can obviously be a good friend to her, but not everyone is healthy or strong enough to let new people into their lives.

 

Be direct - and unafraid of her answer.

[Goldfish6888]

Why not invite her out to something cool - like some new music or something that she is interested in.

 

See if she wants to come along. Make sure you give plenty of notice and keep the invite casual. You don't want to seem desperate.

 

Flattery is always good "hey, thanks for being a brilliant friend and you're great fun to hang out with......etc.....People like to be appreciated as it makes them feel good about themselves.

 

I hope this helps!!

 

G Fish