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My 3 year old daughter is scared of EVERYTHING~


Jamiegirl
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Hi, its been a long time since i have posted a thread on here. My daughter is 3 years old and is absolutely puzzeling me with all her phobias. She's scared of the dark, scared of taking baths, scared of going down the halloween ailse in walmart. scared of bugs. I dont know what is going on with her. but shes scared of everything.

 

The current issue is with the bath. She is afraid to wash her hair which i have tried to get her to wash it her self but then she doesnt get all the soap out so i have to help her so she screams like im murrdering her. And shes even too scared to get into the tub. scared that the water will get too high. I dont understand. She used to be ok with it before and now she isnt.

 

Please give me some advise as of what i could be doing wrong. I try to be patient with her but sometimes i have to just walk away, but i will go nuts. What could be causing all these fears at such a young age. I try to help her not be scared but even then she's still scared and crying and screaming.

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You have to remember that she's only three. Even though I can't remember back that far, my mom says that I was afraid of going through tunnels while in the car, I was scared to death of certain cartoon characters, and all sorts of weird stuff. But eventually I grew out of it. I was also scared to death of learning how to swim and going in deep water where my feet couldn't touch (of course this was when i was a lil older than three). But eventually I got lessons and have loved swimming ever since. I'm sure your child will grow out of it and if not you may want to consider behavioral therapy when she gets a little bit older. Hope this helps!!

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Oh and I forgot to add....ALL children absolutely hate the bath and getting their hair washed! My 6 year old sister still screams bloody murder every time my mom washes her hair. I was the same way! When you get shampoo in your eyes it STINGS! Not fun for a three year old!

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Oh and I forgot to add....ALL children absolutely hate the bath and getting their hair washed! My 6 year old sister still screams bloody murder every time my mom washes her hair. I was the same way! When you get shampoo in your eyes it STINGS! Not fun for a three year old!

 

Yeah i know how that is. My mom told me that i was scared of that stuff when i was little too. the shampoo that i use for her is tear free. so if it does get in the eyes it wont sting. I i dont think she understands this yet. My main thing is just how to deal with this situation. I try to talk to her calmly but sometimes she just totally acts irrational and freaks out.

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Have no Fear..your baby is TOTALLY NORMAL!

I have a 2 yr old. She freaks out!!! When she hears a grass mower, she freaks out when i wash her hair EVERYTIME! She freaks out when some people ( mostly older men) LOOK at her! She freaks out at the mechanic place where i get an oil change because of the noises....humm she just freaks out!

What I read was this and it makes sense. When children are babies, they dont take on the reality that goes on around them.. thereforeeee.. the things she didnt freak out about before..really didnt matter.

But as they get older, reality starts to set in and they are AWARE of their surroundings, they are small people in this great big world and they dont totally understand THIS COLD REALITY.

So once I started explainning.. that the grass mower is just a machine, come let's look at it.. woooowww!

i comforted her by telling her that i am here and nothing will happen to her... the hair thing is still going on.. but she is getting better at times. I reassure that I will not get water in her eyes and i let her hold the hand towel.

It's abolutely normal, only time and explaining what this reality is.. will help her overcome those fears. Good Luck mom!

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Hi, its been a long time since i have posted a thread on here. My daughter is 3 years old and is absolutely puzzeling me with all her phobias. She's scared of the dark, scared of taking baths, scared of going down the halloween ailse in walmart. scared of bugs. I dont know what is going on with her. but shes scared of everything.

 

 

I think it's normal for children at this age to begin responding differently to even daily routine.

 

The halloween aisle is completely understandable at her age. Previously, she probably didn't think "monster is going to get me." Now she see's it and it may frighten her since she's able to reason a little more.

 

My son was scared of bugs. He got used to them.

 

The bath and the dark: Has anyone allowed her to skip a bath, washing her hair, or going to bed in the dark because of her screaming and crying? If so, that may have given her the idea that all she has to do is scream and she'll get out of it.

 

What I've learned from raising my children (daughter 3.5 and son 6.5,) is that exposure helps. I will not let them get away with skipping a bath or not sleeping in their room or anything else that we "need" to do. Children learn manipulation at an early age. They can tell how to get what they want or how to get out of what they don't want.

 

However, if you think it is to the extreme and that there is anything traumatizing that may have triggered this, you may want to consult with a counselor.

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first, yes it's well within normal behavior to develop fears at her age! it's probably a combination of things... but when toddlers learn that they can elicit a big reaction from you and really get your attention... they repeat that behavior! it is hard to deny her wants when she expresses this over-the-top fearful behavior, so she kind of has you where she wants you!

 

there are real things that are scary, and kids that age are learning about their own emotions during this stage of life. she'll more than likely outgrow it when the fear and the behavior no longer serve her.

 

let her know you know that she is scared, reassure her as much as you can, but then be firm if it is something that she needs to get over. (like she HAS to take baths, etc.) but, it is important to let her know you hear her and feel for what she's going through.

 

my almost 6 y.o. daughter is fearful at her age, and it is more of a recent thing. she is genuinely sensitive, but she does use the fear to try to get out of some things. i try to gently make her do some of the things she is scared of, and then praise her like crazy when she makes it through! i tell her that it is much harder to do a thing when you are scared, and she did it and i'm proud!!!

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No kids of my own, but from my own childhood, and that of my younger siblings...totally normal.

 

It's part of their development of their imagination (and IS a good thing honestly!) but also about them putting the world around them into it's own syntax; it's also partly to get a reaction from you too and sometimes if they get certain reactions, they also learn to use it as manipulation. This is why it's important to talk them through it and give them exposure to all sorts of environments and situations, and really take away that fear.

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Agree, totally normal. At 3 years old she is right in the middle of the "scary monsters" phase.

 

You are doing the right thing. Always stay calm she will learn and take her cues from you. You can't rationalise her her fears away but you can show her by example that there is nothing to be afraid of.

 

She will grow out of a lot of them by the time she is around 5 or so.

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Yes OMG, my daughter went through that phase of scary noises too. She was scared of every noise. the garbage truck especially that would drive by the house when she was about 18 months old she went through this phase.

 

Thanks for everyones advice, I believe this will help me better to deal with this situation.

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