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hi everyone...

its my first time on a forum so... hehe any advice will be welcomed...

 

me and my ex-fiance have been together for 5 years of which four were long distance. i broke up with him last year because we were always fighting and everythign i did and said turned out to be a basis for him to threaten to break-up. i got confused at the sametime as to what the hell was happening and was crying most of the time but loved him to death! but i couldnt handle it and broke up with him!

 

i met him again a few months later (tht was 3 years after i had left the country) and as soon as i saw him i knew he still loved me and we got back together! i told him that i had a short term relationship with a jack- * * * during the break up time but NEVER while i was with him... and he told me that he had a one night stand with some * * * * * too. i was actually ok with it bcs he still loved me... but 8 months later he broke up with me saying that im the back stabber and that im his downfall! i honeslty am trying to forget him.. but everyhting i do his name or something comes up! he was mean to me and i cant understand why! i forgave and forget, why couldnt he? i NEED to get over him bcs im flunking my exams too...

 

please help? sorry for the long thread

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it will just take time, it's hard to get over anyone you loved, jerk or not. I've been there, and couldn't understand why I couldn't get over him cuz he was SUCH a jerk!! but all it ook was time and alot of distractions! stay busy w/friends and maybe even a new guy Also, remember and focus on the negatives of this guy so you won't end up giving in again. Anyways, you will get over him, just be paitent. I know it's hard.

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thanks yvette84 im in a new place at the moment so still trying to make friends... ( a little hard with exams around the corner though) all my other friends are in other countries and i hardly talk to them... i feel REALLY pathetic to still not be over him after months! part of me wants him to see the irony of what he accused me of and come to his senses and the rest wants me to hate him, but cant but i WILL def try to keep thinking of the negatives...

 

thank you again

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when was the last time you guys break up? Are you sure it's over between you guys?

 

To forgive and forget a person takes time. Maybe your ex just need more time to forget what happened, if he really loves you, he will realize that and come back to you.

 

If you believe it is really over between you guys, then start NC right way. healing takes time, sometimes it can take months to get over a person.

 

Try not let this influence your study. I made that mistakes before. My GPA dropped from 3.8 to 2.5 one semester in college after i was dumped, i had to study extra hard to made it up later on.

 

By end of the day, what is most important is you and your education, your future depends on it.

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we broke up in august, he ususally always breaks up with me and i always call him back and after a few hours he cools down and apologises... i knew it was the distance bcs he didnt want me to leave and thinks that i couldve stayed behind, when i really didnt have a choice...

 

honestly i dont want it to be over... he was REALLY special because he was my first, and we were to get married as well... my family considered him a part of the family, and my family was the only family he loved too. its me who ususally calls after he breaks-up and i did once. i dont have a way of contacting him bcs if i call im scared he would just hang up on me and ill be more hurt... and he's not trying to talk to me either.

 

im pretty much confused, because i hate trusting people, and he was the only person i did trust...

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i did something stupid... i was trying to study for my finals and couldnt even see what was written in the page infront of me... i feel REALLY pathetic about everything and i HONESLTY am trying to get myself together... at least throught he exams...

 

it was his birthday this month, and i didnt wish him, bcs i was scared he would tell me to eff off as thts what he last said... so i didnt do anything.. and i saw a dream of him asking me why i forgot him and i was so upset becaue in reality i was the only person who was close enough to hang out with him... so i sent him a short message saying that im sorry ididnt wish him bcs i was scared... and that i hope he had a good birthday and he does well in his exams. im such a screwed up girl right now!

 

i still want to believe we were meant to be... in our culture we take horoscopes very serisouly (im trying to break away though!) and our horoscopes were matched and we were told that we have been soulmates in prev lives... and that keep haunting me...

 

i am going NUTS!

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