Please help me understand

[wonderfulconfusion]

I dont know if qny of you remember my situqtion but its come to a point where I dont know what to think anymore.

 

After nine months of ups and downs now, we saw each other last monday and had a great time together. I knew I wouldnt get news from him after a few days....he has financial problems....

 

Friday he wrote me a test saying, please stop contactingme and please respect that... I called him asking him why if it was because he was with someone else and that I could respect that but otherwise to give me an explaination... he just said that he realized that he needed time off blabla...

 

That evening I saw him, he knew id be there because I told him, he was with two other girls. After leaving i sent him a text saying, i understand now why you want me to leave u alone.... he called back saying that it has nothing to do with that and that they were two friends, one married the other divorced... thigns got a bit messy and angry so i hung up. Two hours later he called saying he didnt want us to fight and be mean with each other. I told him that I wanted things to work out either way, he responded, we'll talk about it if you want ill call you tomorrow.

 

So we talked today. I asked him if we could have dinner together tomorrow, he replied saying he doesnt remember if he has anythign planned and that he'd tell me what tomorrow. I answered asking him to give me the priority ( ive asked this loads of times to discuss things everytime giving the same answer).

 

I got upset and told him, let it go, if you really wanted to see me you'd want to come without an excuse. So he wrote a text telling me again, i want to be alone and be with people that understand me so dont contact me and have dinner with someone else. So i played the game and said ok, ill have dinner with Quentin (friend), he replied, oh good, things are clear now i wish you the best ...

 

This guy has been putting me through i dont want to see you stop calling me then to lets get back together... we never had a proper NC....now that he's asking for it I want to understand why he wants it...if its to forget me or deal zith his problems.... is he with someone else now, would he have told me? Can i expect him to call me sometime if i stop calling and writing him? Was i too sticky when he's going through bad times...

 

I know he has feelings for me, but we've screwed up so ;many times with fights.... how do i handle this one guys to someday be on good terms?

HELP

[majord23]

we never had a proper NC........ how do i handle this one guys to someday be on good terms?

 

And there's your answer.

 

If you genuinely want to be on good terms with him, give him what he wants - No Contact. His reasons for wanting it aren't important, and make no difference - don't go on a mission to find out, just accept it and let him go.

 

Maybe months down the line he will contact you and you can begin a friendship - or if you don't hear from him in 6 months, you can send him a short email asking him how he is and take it from there.