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Fortysomething virgin follow-up report


SquareWheel
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Okay, yesterday (saturday) was the second and last day of the big Halloween festival in Atlanta, and yesterday's news is even more exciting than friday's news!

 

It was a great festival this year. I enjoyed the crowds, the parade, the obnoxiously loud bands, and especially the women in their costumes. Where else but in heaven itself can a guy be surrounded by so many stunning naughty nurses, sexy pirates, and bad-a__ biker chicks?

 

One wonderful girl even got on a cement bench, snatched off her top, and did a wild exotic dance in just her jeans and bra, which included acrobatics in a tree behind the bench. At first I started to film her, but then I decided that was a bad idea. After all, she might be drunk and regret her performance the next day. But when I turned my camera off, she gave me a hurt look as if to ask why I'd lost interest in her. So I resumed taping her and she immediately perked up and began playing to the camera. She was obviously enjoying performing as much as I enjoyed watching. I'll treasure that video clip for the rest of my life.

 

But that isn't even the big news! The big news is that I found myself standing next to a cute woman with short blonde hair who seemed to be really getting into the music, and I spoke to her. Don't recall what I said, but I was surprised at how friendly and open she was. In minutes, we were talking as if we actually knew each other. We were leaning in together so that our faces were just inches apart. It felt so intimate! I thought I was dreaming.

 

Anyway, she eventually had to leave, but in a fit of reckless courage, I asked if she'd like to meet again sometime and maybe have dinner or see a movie. She said yes! She seemed reluctant to give out her phone number, but asked for my e-mail. I gave it to her, and she said she'd e-mail me. As she was leaving, I boldly told her I thought she was pretty cool, and she seemed clearly flattered. I was walking on clouds the rest of the night.

 

This has been one of the crappiest years on record out of the forty-some that I've seen so far, but last night made everything look a little better, at least for now. I didn't hook up with a beautiful stranger and spend a wild night in her apartment like they do on TV; for that ultimate dream the struggle goes on.

 

But even if my wonderful new friend turns out to have been only a passing just-for-that-moment acquaintance, I'll never forget how that moment felt. And the girl on the bench will be young and beautiful forever in my video clip. So last night gave me some good feelings that'll keep me going for a while yet.

 

Man I'm getting sentimental in my middle age...

 

 

P.S. - If by a one-in-ten-million chance you happen to be the biker chick who was in the parade, the one riding the green chopper and wearing the frilly pirate shirt, red bandanna, corset and stilletto-heeled boots, PM ME! I want to marry you!

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Hi. I'm not the biker chick, sorry to say, but I wanted to congratulate you on your accomplishment. Great job talking to her, heroic job asking her out. I'm not familiar with your whole story, but I know how scary that can be.

 

Even though a nice girl will never kill you for asking, or even make you feel the slightest bit uncomfortable if she's not interested.

 

So keep doing that. Keep meeting and inviting. As a matter of fact, I've found that the best way to phrase it is to invite her to join me for something (cup of coffee, etc..). That way you flatter her by giving her a chance to join you in your life, instead of asking her to spend time with you. It's less needy. Am I making sense?

 

Now there may be some rain on the parade here, she may not email you. Don't get discouraged, and keep on hunting. If there's one thing you can improve, it's this:

 

As she was leaving, I boldly told her I thought she was pretty cool, and she seemed clearly flattered.

 

I try to be careful about seeming too interested or impressed by a girl. It can scare some away. Women like a little challenge, so by telling her she's cool or beautiful off the bat she may think she's already got you in her pocket. That doesn't, as a rule, make her overly attracted to you.

 

It might have been better if you said "I'd like to see if you're as cool as you seem," or something like that.

 

So great work, enjoy your successes and keep swinging!

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Hazlcha gave really good advice, I thought. You do have to act like you don't neeeeeed them. And so casually asking "I need a coffee. Do you fancy joining me?" would probably seem less needy and thereforeeee, less threatening.

 

Good on you for having the courage though and I have no doubt that it will pay off, if not this time, sometime soon.

 

Wishing you well.

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