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I saw a photo of my ex tonight. Its the first time I have "seen" her in 6 months.....And she looked healthy, she looked happy...She looked beautiful...

 

And after the tear rolled down my cheek from the sight of her, I realize she has really moved on. She has really moved on with her life without me...Close to 9 months since our breakup and tonight...with no words...no fights...no pushing...I look at her and know she is happy...

 

...and she is happy with another man...who is not me...

 

Tonight is the night that I move on...it hurts...and with another tear I face my demons and stand here watching that door close. I regret what has happened, but have been trapped in this past fighting this ghost too long...

 

Goodbye Claire. I love you. And I hope you all the best in the world, tonight I truly mean that with everything I have in my heart and I am happy you have found happiness. This may not have been how I wanted things to turn out...I'm sorry.

 

Tonight I move on...

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*hugs*

 

Realizing that your past love is truly happy with somebody else is probably the best motivation to let go of any residual hope and move on...

 

Keep on chugging along, and one day whoever happens to look at your picture will realize that you too are truly happy...someday, with somebody else...

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Be thankful that she has moved on and is not playing games with you! Many break ups leave a huge question mark as to should I wait, maybe they will come back. This of course slows the healing process and prevents you from moving on to something or someone better. There are no reasons now to ever look back, you've been there. Go forward and realize it's your turn to be happy.

 

RC

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crvers, our stories and struggles have been very similar. i can totally relate to you as i have been/am going through the same thing.

 

it's very hard to finally realize it's not worth fighting and to just let go.

 

i am proud of you! i know it hurts and it's sad but as RC said, at least you know exactly what to do.

 

hopefully i can finally let go myself.

 

take care of yourself and PM me anytime you need to.

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Damn sorry to hear that bro. I feel the same way as you right now and yeah it is time for me and you to move on. Theres no point of looking back because she's already happy with the guy but my ex is supposedly "in love" with the guy and its only been a month since they went out. She got with him after she broke up with me so that's the part that killed me. Your not the only one

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You all are right. Its time to let go of the resentment...the pain...the loss...

 

A friend of mine said today "You just have to tell yourself, that her being happy is the most important thing. Its the only thing even if its not with you."

 

And she's right. Yesturday was the first time where something happened revolving her and I didn't get angry. I didn't signoff in my head how pissed off I had been about it all. It was the first time....It doesn't matter really...It not longer a shame because this is the way events were to play out. And at the end of the day, happiness is all that matters.

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  • 3 weeks later...

i saw my ex "N" with his new girlfriend face to face. i went numb and inttotal shock. i am still realing from it, believe me. problem is - he says that maybe in 6 moths after him and i have "been out there" we will find our way back. it is hard to move on when you think that someone willstill be there waiting. meanwhile, i have neet someon but i cant get the jerk out of my mind. this is tourture.

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You know when I read your post...I said to myself that I need to do that. I mean he is getting married in a month. He is still trying to contact me and i continue to ignore him.

 

For about 6 months now, I have truly been on a roller coaster and its weird. I try my hardest to be happy and I am determined to live my life and achieve my dreams, but that one part of me still feels empty. Everyone that knows me ...knows that something about me isn't right and I have been trying for so long to do what you have done. We have had no contact since June.

 

On wed, he texted me and asked if I was still mad at him. He chose to lose his relationship and be with his now fiance and he chose to smear it in my face and play games. So much of me has let it go but I still have anger.

 

I mean guys want to talk to me and i just keep walking, brush them off with the cold shoulder or just flat out diss them. I know its mean and maybe they dont all want to date but I just cant handle it right now. Any man ..I just dont want anything to do with.

 

I guess what you did by saying goodbye and truly letting go would help me ...i just dont know how ...I have tried this and it hasnt worked.

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For about 6 months now, I have truly been on a roller coaster and its weird. I try my hardest to be happy and I am determined to live my life and achieve my dreams, but that one part of me still feels empty. Everyone that knows me ...knows that something about me isn't right and I have been trying for so long to do what you have done. We have had no contact since June.

 

On wed, he texted me and asked if I was still mad at him. He chose to lose his relationship and be with his now fiance and he chose to smear it in my face and play games. So much of me has let it go but I still have anger.

 

Sometimes our exes do things that contradict the reasons for the breakup. And other times they just want justification for what transpired. Whether it be guilt, satisfaction, or spite, they do things that in the end only disrupt our lives.

 

In the end we can only focus on ourselves and fight the good fight to make ourselves better. I found the anger was the only thing, for a time, that saved me from falling too far. The anger gave me the strength to realize I am better than this and that I do matter.

 

There are some days I feel sorry for myself and reflect. But most days now I am genuinely happy. You just keep moving forward, and as much at one time I didn't believe it, the pain subsides...the emptiness is replaced...Just give it time, and eventually when your ready someone will ignite the fire once again.

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i saw my ex "N" with his new girlfriend face to face. i went numb and inttotal shock. i am still realing from it, believe me. problem is - he says that maybe in 6 moths after him and i have "been out there" we will find our way back. it is hard to move on when you think that someone willstill be there waiting. meanwhile, i have neet someon but i cant get the jerk out of my mind. this is tourture.

 

Unfortunately, from what you wrote, he's just tugging the line. Insuring that he can be "single" and do whatever he wants, and when he's full and ready will come back. Its not entirely fair to you. If I could provide you with any sure advice it would be this:

 

Do whats right for you. Move forward with your life and find someone who will want to be, and remain, with you. Its just not worth wasting your time waiting for someone who will use you as a backup. And, by ripping the safety net he has created away from him, he'll have to make a real decision as to what he wants...Just realize he already not chosen you.

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