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Happiness


enolaton
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yeah it does no twork. It is a misconception.

 

I'm not looking for anything to work. It's truly now for reconciliation. I just want to make her happy. For anyone who's followed my threads, they know I've struggled with being friends with the ex since the day of the break-up. After 3 months of NC, she calls me STILL wanting to be friends. She's maintained so for over a year now, never letting up. She seems to need me, and I want to be there for her, but at what price and sacrifice of my own happiness?

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How much does she need you though? The only way you should sacrifice your own happiness is if she is a mess with nobody else to lean on, if she really truly needs your help. Basically, if she's in the kind of situation where anybody who has a heart would want to help, and it would be a cruel thing not to do so (I remember a thread on here about somebody's ex having a terminal illness and wanting to see them...it's that kind of thing I'm talking about. Extreme situations).

 

But if she just needs you as a friend to hang out with every once in a while, it's not worth it. If she can't make you happy, why should you throw away your chances of being happy alone/with someone else by trying to make her happy?

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you missed my point. It is a misconception. No such thing as sacraficing your own happiness for another. It will only leave you unhappy.

 

Does not matter what you went through with an ex.

 

think about it. Why would you sacrafice your own happiness?? Out of love?? That is not love.

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Yeah, and I am starting to feel very angry about it. It is not like me!

 

Thought I was being supportive, doing something good for him that he would appreciate. TRUSTED him.

 

Well, now that is over and he got all the benefits and I am left with my own little situation here. And I resent him for taking it too. I'll get over it, I am more mad at myself than anything, It is not like me! , but right now I feel somewhat used.

 

Never assume the other will return the 'favour'. Doesn't work that way. If you can't afford to give something, you can't afford to give it. simple as that.

 

Sucks. Doesn't work. I should have told him to hit the road if he couldn't be happy with what I had to give.

 

Knew that frigging Catholic background and the whole martyrdom trip would sneak up on me at some point.

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