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wanting to give up but just not possible


Andrew11
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my ex gf and i still talk and are still kind of friends. the thing is she keeps telling me that she doesnt kno if she wants to get back together with me or not. this has been going on for a month and a half. at first she wanted nc but then she broke it and we were fine with that. then it hurt me to much to kno shes right there and i cant have her so then i wanted nc. every once and a while she would try to get ahold of me but i would never answer her or talk to her. then i broke that nc and talked to her and it didnt seem to bother her or anything that i wanted nc. i dont kno for sure but deep down in my heart i think she still loves me but im not sure what to think anymore. and i think half the reason she is taking so long to decide is that her best friend (who happens to be THE BIGGEST {mod edit} i have ever met) doesnt like me one bit and is trying to keep her away from me. when i am talking to my ex when she is around her she doesnt seem to want to talk to me for more than 5 or 10 mins. but when she is alone and i am talking to her she is a whole different person. she will actually talk to me nicely and for a really long time. tonite i talked to her for almost 2 hours until it got pretty late and she wanted to go to bed. i would just like to kno if anyone out there has any ideas on what she is doing or what she is feeling or what she plans to do with our relationship. and the thing is ive been offered a job paying really good money on the other side of the country and have to leave within a couple of months. but i have told her this and ive told her that if we ever got back together before then that i would turn down the job and not move away just so i could be with her. but she is still taking her sweet time. i love her more than anything in the world and would do anything for her (like turning down a really good paying job). so would you please help me out and let me know what she is feeling or what she wants to happen. i appreciate all the help in advance!....thanks

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i dont kno for sure but deep down in my heart i think she still loves me but im not sure what to think anymore.

 

Everyone who has been dumped thinks this, "What is there not to love?!?"

 

No she does not still love you in that way. If she did she would be with you. No, her best friend has nothing to do with her decision or if she does then her love is so shallow as to be not worth having.

 

Take the job far away and start to work on moving your life on to the next exciting phase.

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Hi, if you dont take this job and you stay and things dont work , well you will have regrets here my friend, Shes got you on the back foot and knows shes got the control, thats not fair to you. Its not all about what she wants although you want things to work. Dont stay and have regrets , this is your chance , if its not going to work, move on, it will be you closing the door . If shes prepared to let you go then hey theres a better world out there than the one your in now.

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One thing to understand is that she is not going to make up her mind until you put your foot down and make her do it. This is just the way people work, that they like keeping their options open. So let her know how you feel about her. that you want a relationship with her, and that if she's not interested right now, then it's over and you don't want contact anymore. This is what to do if you wanna do what's right for you.

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I turned down a job, in order to stay with my EX (yes, you read that right) a short time ago.

 

Mind you that it took her forever to not want me to go AND we were both crying (this of course, during the time she supposedly did NOT love me anymore) AND I called the day I was supposed to be there and told them I was not coming.

 

So, we stay in the place that she bought, but cannot afford, because she wants to SHOW her family and everyone else that she can do it. I talk to a friend who helps get her out of trouble and of course with my sizeable rent amount that she is getting now (because I have now moved out of my apartment and in with her) she can now keep her place. Then, that same friend purchases her place and lets her walk away with CASH.

 

We then move into an apartment together and furnish it with my stuff. Or course even if she wanted to move into the apartment by herself, she could not have, because she needed my help (monetarily and credit-wise).

 

So, I then decide to take a job that is further North of where I live, because at this point, I need to make some money. I go home on her birthday, we argue and she just "doesn't feel it anymore". So, after coming home and going back, she decides to make it clear that we are broken up, AFTER I am back at the new job.

 

Needless to say, if she would have told me that she didn't care for me, I could have taken the other job, not burned any bridges and had much more of my debt paid off. Also, it is very interesting that she hppily took Christmas gifts (without even once thinking of me) and happily took my rent, all the while she wasn't in love with me and did not want to be with me (gleaned from her own admission of feeling like she wanted out, for the last 2 years).

 

SO, the moral of this story is...

 

 

TAKE THE JOB!!! LOOK OUT FOR YOU!!!!

 

Oh yeah, and...GOOD LUCK!

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