Anyone else experiencing "you need therapy"

[speed_demon]

OK, I'm 21, Been shy a strong majority of my life. My grandmother past away last year And I havent done anything but withdraw from everyone since then. I used to be called by peple wanting to hang out... since stopped. Used to be good with girls, I can't even hold a conversation (I try, but they have no apparent interest). I dont' get it... so much has changed... maybe it really is me whose changed. I bought an '88 corvette convertible, and now my parents are suggesting selling it to pay for therapy I keep telling them that it would be a waste of my time, money, and they would only find out the same thing that I already know... THERES NOTHING WRONG WITH ME. They have just recently been getting into this. I feel so flippin alone it aint even funny. I have an ex who used to call regularly to talk but now she's happy so she doesnt. That's typical with my friends also, they only come around when they need something. "find better friends" doesnt matter who it is or where I look.. same ole same ole. School offers a free consulor (sp?) But I don't take it up, thinking about it tho. Maybe they have a way I can get over being shy? Anyways, I'm new here kinda (registered but forgot). My gram was my world, and not a day has gone by that is a normal day. Always something to piss my parents off.... we used to be close but now we're drifting apart really badly. think that's a big reason I dont want anything to do with them or their help. They ALWAYS get in the way when helping. Oh well, I'm currently F/T work F/T college. I'm single, and it FREAKIN sucks! I havent been touched physically in prolly 3-4 months. that's any kind, sexual, non-sexual you name it. (handshakes are the exception). Think that would help me feel better tho. I'm always hurting in some form... If not physical pains from w/e then it's mentally hurting. I'm attention deprived I know that much. I work at an auto parts store, as the "parts pro". great dealing with customers... when I'm at the shop I find myself taging along with myco-workers when no one is in the store. Ok sounds like I need therapy now.. \\

 

Anyone else going thru something like this or am I the only lucky one? If you are please post and tell how your dealing with it?

 

 

(theres a ton more info, but it's worthless to put it up)

[Fallout]

But there is something wrong with you...shyness and anxiety is what it is..

 

Going to therapy doesn't mean you're sick in the head...in your case you have an emotional imbalance that's all...and therapy can just help you get over being so shy

[monkey1]

sounds like you've gone through a lot at least since your grandmother passed a way. maybe talking to someone at school can help you a bit. and there isn't anything wrong with wanting to talk to someone. sometimes we don't know how to make things better or see thing from the outside in. going to someone can help to see things clearer for you.

[speed_demon]

Going to therapy doesn't mean you're sick in the head...in your case you have an emotional imbalance that's all...

 

 

Wouldnt an emotional imbalance mean I'm sick in the head?

 

No anxiety.

 

I withdraw because people bug me, for various reasons; Their voices, reapeated Q's, they get upset with me and I didnt even have time to react, they are in the way, not very bright, slow, etc.etc.etc. I did however find a website that defines me as to why I'm quiet all the time.link removed

 

I don't like that reply.... NEXT! [-(

[speed_demon]

sounds like you've gone through a lot at least since your grandmother passed a way. maybe talking to someone at school can help you a bit. and there isn't anything wrong with wanting to talk to someone. sometimes we don't know how to make things better or see thing from the outside in. going to someone can help to see things clearer for you.

 

I like this one.... Very much so!

 

See that's what I dont have anymore is someone to just talk to. They've either passed away, moved away, lost contact with, etc. My gram was my best/closest friend to boot. Finding someone to vent to aint gunna be easy... The counslor wont have the emotional level which is good i'm assuming.

 

I was just thinking about what I did go thru since my grams passing and you're right I have gone thru a lot...

[talo]

I havent been touched physically in prolly 3-4 months. that's any kind, sexual, non-sexual you name it. (handshakes are the exception). Think that would help me feel better tho.

 

I withdraw because people bug me, for various reasons

 

How do you get to the stage of touching people if they bug you?

 

I have found that the biggest bug is how I bug myself. I put all sorts of bugs in and on me, so much so sometimes, that I can't do or say anything without being 'picked up', be bugged, hounded, by myself. I guess this could be called being a bit of a bugger.

[Fallout]

lol...the brain and soul are two different entities...you need help with your emotions, you don't have a mental disorder (which is what I meant by "sick in the head") you seem to think therapy is only for crazy people.

 

Why not just try hanging out with someone a few times...that's a great way of getting over shyness too. And don't be conceited towards them as you seem to be, just listen to what they say and have some fun without rationalizing everything.

[speed_demon]

The touch thing is tricky. Hard to explain.

 

 

 

I'm a "parts pro" at the auto parts store I work at so I have a LOT of human interactions... but off work I find it hard to just go strike up a convo with someone new, unless alone...sometimes. Granted I'm not nearly as shy as I was a month ago but it's still ridiculously sad.

 

Oh but, Therapy is for the crazy people! I get what your saying and all, but I dont like that people judge and base me on others there for "that's what you need" I've had a counsler tell me that in H.S. after taking 30 mins of verbal and phsyical abuse before I fought back (I'm mean F O U G H T) so I went to an "anger management" course. Everyone in there were literally trying to having a reason to fight and at the end of the course the instructor came to me and ask "why were you sent here? You don't have an anger problem." Hope you understand that view on why I dont think therapy is what I (me personally) need. Also, with pills/meds. I wont take them because I know more about what my body needs phsyically than anyone else. I'd like to stay away from the therapy side of things as much as possible.

 

As for me being "conceited", I wont deny it I am. But you give me a puzzle and 9 times out of 10 I'll have it done before them. Give me a complex equation, I'll be done with it sooner. Ask me to rebuild a motor for anything, I'll get it done and running strong sooner than the majority. I have listened to everyone and do listen to those with more knowledge than myself but Once I gather all the knowledge from them It's like they start to repeat themselves.... Like they ran out of knowledge.... . So that's all they do... repeat. I let people do... watch them fail and try again.... then I get frustrated and do it for them right the first time and it's a better product than they could come up with. It's not just related to physically doing. It's also in the verbal/political side of things. I can walk into a commissioners office and get more done than the average person. Life isn't that big of a challenge any more... and it sucks. I love challenges, and hate repeating things. Do it once, Do it right, Do it better than everyone else = Big $$$

[Fallout]

There is a difference between IQ level and intelligence.... *IF* what you say is true..your biggest fault is thinking you are always right no matter what everyone says...

 

You had one experience with a type of counselling (anger management is a specialized type and of course people have anger problems there) so now you think, against all common sense that counselling is just for crazies etc.

 

You'll never get over any problem until you admit it's there, right now you see nothing wrong with yourself and you won't accept being wrong on anything it seems...

[kiki]

Hi speed demon

 

You sound pretty strong headed, you seem insistant that you don't want help/ therapy but you know, it's ok to feel 'weak' and it's definitely ok to get things wrong and by admitting that, that is whats makes us strong. You say you like a challenge so why not turn your weaknesses into challenges? Make new friends or make the effort to catch up with the friends you havent heard from for a long time ^^

 

Have a think about your qualities, you insist that there is nothing wrong with you, that maybe so but then why are you writing here then? Therapy may not be your thing so how about other forms of help- i.e: (if youre from the UK) call the samaritains (they have that in the US too right??)

 

you also say you dont like repeating yourself.. but isnt that how we learn? im sure when you walked for the first time, you were not running!

 

i went through a different stage ( a quaterlife crisis i guess!) im 21 and hell, my life was a downward spiral no matter how positive i tried to remain so i decided to take up a completely new sport and combat my shyness by getting rid of my inhibitions and just going for it! i.e: just saying Hi to class members or just random chit chat!- i.e: nice day bla bla!)

 

only you can decide what happens to you now, i wish you well and hope *hugs*

[speed_demon]

There is a difference between IQ level and intelligence.... *IF* what you say is true..your biggest fault is thinking you are always right no matter what everyone says...

 

You had one experience with a type of counselling (anger management is a specialized type and of course people have anger problems there) so now you think, against all common sense that counselling is just for crazies etc.

 

You'll never get over any problem until you admit it's there, right now you see nothing wrong with yourself and you won't accept being wrong on anything it seems...

 

 

See You just assumed that I experienced one type of counselling. See as I stated earlier theres more to me than I want people to know of. And anger management was just and example of one reason why I don't like people judging me before they know me better... very one track sided mind you have. "Everyone needs therapy" yes I know I just judged you like you have me... but I feel that's much closer to you as a person than you have been with me. see You assume I wont accept being wrong and must always be right. I do see/accept errors I make, just dont voice 'em... and usually fix them before anyone else notices and if they have I just go "ah, I goofed" as I'm changing it for/to the better. Oh buddy ole pal, I paid cash for my corvette, and I'm only 21, I also own a house and multiple cars. Just because you say "your biggest fault is thinking you are always right no matter what everyone says" Doesnt mean your right. I must be doing something right or else I wouldn't have achieved all of that. So before you go off saying "you need therapy because it'll fix you" think about this... Why dont you go work for the drug companies? Ya know BIG business... they would love to get people like you on their payroll

 

Oh and btw, what do you think my problem is? I can tell you right now You're far from a solution.

[Fallout]

Of course I can't know you really well from a thread over the internet, but from what you disclosed a big problem with you seems to be a superiority complex...Why do you need to brag in every post about how many cars, money and houses you have ? Seriously ask yourself why you said those things...does it make you feel better that you have more stuff than most?

 

Don't you think you are using those material things to fill your emotional void? It's pretty obvious you are not a happy person, having good stuff probably gets you some pleasure now and then but nothing consistant.

 

Ask yourself this...would you prefer being unhappy your whole life but very rich...or happy and within the middle class living standard range?

 

See, I don't think everyone needs therapy, I know I do but never been so it could seem a little hypocritical telling you this...but I think you do need it because you are unhappy with your life and that could guide you to making the changes...

 

And bout me giving a solution...well let's just say I've been in a somewhat similar state of mind as you are now...and first of all you need to recognize the problem - which I think is the one mentioned above

 

You know, some philosopher once said that the hardest thing to do for a human being is admitting they are not the center of the universe...work on that

[speed_demon]

Hi kiki,

 

Yes I am very head strong](*,) .

 

I have started to attack my weakness', started this last summer. I had my gram pass away who was my life (July '05) and with that I lost a good strong 19 (at the time) years of my history down the tubes, she was my best friend, and one to whom I spent my life around. The day after she passed away I met this girl (fell in love blah blah blah) well this summer I went up and stayed by her. Then things got weird people were saying not true stuff and well that ended that for the summer, she's still around but her mom and sisters don't like me because me and her mom had a disagreement when I was teaching her something new.. tells my aunt "if it was a girl teaching me I wouldn't have gotten made" and then tell my ex and her sisters "it was his tone of voice" what the heck! (their dad/her husband was a really bad guy). well after that this summer I noticed I would cling to who ever talked so I became tough. I was always strong headed but now I'm 10 fold. I can do ANYTHING, why? because nothing is impossible. so I strive to achieve as much as humanly possible before I die one day. I dont have a relationship bind but yet I wish I could get what you just gave me in a post. a hug I havent had one since early july.

 

How did you get past the inhibitions? I'm liking your reply and the reply from monkey 1.

 

( Fallout can just fall out of this thread. People like him are why society is built on drug money. Hey drug companies are legal AND they do sell drugs, and IT IS big business. )

 

I originally posted to see if anyone else was going thru the same things. Like you said I'm head strong, and I can handle my own... just felt so alone when I posted. It seems I am but it's cool, It good to know someone who changed their path I work for an auto parts store and have interactions with people and can get them to laugh, I'm the top parts pro there. Meaning I know more than the associates and the other two parts pro's. Basically life is just the use of common sense. It's nothing specialized. "Special" fields is something just started to come about in the last 5-10 or so years. Before then techinology was expense and labor cheap, no-a-days it's cheap technology and expensive labor. But specialized is just saying "I'd rather do this one thing than the list of things before" For example when I sell something for a honda and the guy goes "you know much about them?" "nah, I deal with chevy V8's mostly" that doesnt mean I dont know much about them, I'm just covering my back against a possible "wrong" which is why we have specialist now. "I can do that, but I'm trained to do this". Ok that got off topic, sorry about that.

 

Was going to do a short reply but I got carried away... NO THERAPY NEEDED to fix this... easy fix... a hug

[monkey1]

so are you going to seek some therapy or try to find someone to talk to?

[speed_demon]

Gunna try to find someone to talk to.