Feeling sorry for myself

[Biffy]

this evening.

 

The ups and downs in the wake of my break up are so frustrating.

 

I've been fine for a few days, been applying negative thoughts about my ex whenever I think of her and been keeping busy but didn't manage to sort something for tonight so am torturing myself over the ex.

 

I wish I could stop wanting her back and thinking that there's a chance we will reconcile.

[friscodj]

Hey bro-

 

It's tough man, I know exactly how you feel.

 

As far as your frustration goes, I've found it is better to embrace the grief and suffering, expect it, know it is normal and needs to happen so you can get back to better emotional places and be ready for a new and better love.

 

On top of this, I've also done somethings to (try to) outsmart this frustrating cycle. Expect and prepare for things to be the worst imaginable. Then when things are only "bad", you see that things are actually "good" relative to your apocalyptic expectations and preparations...

 

But yeah, nothing will "cure" this. Keep busy, keep a balanced perspective, i.e., your heart resurfaces memories of the "good" of the relationship so it is only fair to balance it with your head reminding you of the "bad", and keep the distance. You're doing good.

[SoontobeRN]

Hey Zombian!

Totally on the same page as you...it's hard

It's been easy for the last little bit (about a month), but it seems to be getting harder again each day...

 

STB

[Biffy]

I've been dumped a bunch of times before and after a time of reflection I've accepted it and known that the ex wasn't right for me, this time around it just feels so wrong... I've never felt such a bond and connection to another human being as I have with my most recent ex and I'm pretty sure she felt that too. That's what's making it so difficult to let her go.

 

After 6 weeks, if she wanted me back I guess I would have known about it by now but it's damn hard accepting that.

 

No matter how much I tell myself it ain't gonna happen and that I shouldn't want it to happen after she dumped me I still find myself occasionaly thinking it might, which rebuilds the hope which sends me all the way back to square one.

 

1 step forward, 2 steps back!

[SoontobeRN]

ZOMBIAN!

People keep saying "1 STEP FORWARD, 2 STEPS BACK"

NOOOOT TRUUUE!!

 

IT's "2 STEPS FORWAD, 1 STEP BACK"-otherwise you'll constantly be going back-I'm not saying this to "correct" you, I'm showing you that you are making progress...I should say WE are making progress because I'm going through the same things too

 

Just because we feel sad again, depressed, alone and miss our ex's doesn't mean we're going backwards, it means we're going forward but had to stop and figure out how to get over this "bump"...SO REMEMBER, 2 STEPS FORWARD, 1 STEP BACK OK!

 

step, step, BACK 1, step, step, BACK 1---soon it's going to be

 

STEP STEP STEP STEP JOG JOG JOG RUN RUN SPRINT SPINT SPRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINT TO THE FINISH LINE

 

 

STB

[Vynde]

ZOMBIAN!

People keep saying "1 STEP FORWARD, 2 STEPS BACK"

NOOOOT TRUUUE!!

 

IT's "2 STEPS FORWAD, 1 STEP BACK"-otherwise you'll constantly be going back-I'm not saying this to "correct" you, I'm showing you that you are making progress...I should say WE are making progress because I'm going through the same things too

 

Just because we feel sad again, depressed, alone and miss our ex's doesn't mean we're going backwards, it means we're going forward but had to stop and figure out how to get over this "bump"...SO REMEMBER, 2 STEPS FORWARD, 1 STEP BACK OK!

 

step, step, BACK 1, step, step, BACK 1---soon it's going to be

 

STEP STEP STEP STEP JOG JOG JOG RUN RUN SPRINT SPINT SPRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINT TO THE FINISH LINE

 

 

STB

 

I'm experiencing the same "1 step back feeling" funny (well not funny) how so many people are going through this. It's a good feeling to know that im not the only one who wakes up in the morning and feel these horrible emotions..

 

Its hard for people who have not experienced this to understand "Why" we would want our ex's back after all they put us though.. I know sometimes I even wonder why I would want her back.. ( I still love her ) that's why, and I wish I knew how long it will take to get over that 

 

But just like you guys, I hold on to knowing full well that I shouldn't, It doesn't stop me from wondering that she might come back, saying what a HUGE mistake she made and that we will be "fine" and "Happy"

 

I know that day will never come, as she is over this.. (Which hurts more) but I still hope.. And then hurt.

 

I feel you guys/gals.. I do. More than you know. Each day is a battle..

 

I'm glad to be here with you.. So glad.

 

John