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just broke up a few nights ago and it feels like it's really over this time. we've been together for almost 2 years and it's been good. we're both women and we both want families and realize that we can't do that with each other. neither of us wants to come out. last night was angry and bad, i dont think there's any turning back. she hasn't called today and i don't know how to sleep without her. i have slept 15 hours in 4 days and haven't eaten much, but definetly smoked enough cigarettes to kill a small pig. what should i do to calm my mind enough to see what to do? is it really over? i know i have to let her cool off but do i have to let it go? i want to call her hear her voice.

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If neither of you wants what a complete relationship together would take, then you need to stay away from her, because being near and around her will extend the hurt. To heal, you need time to sever the emotional attachment. I think the only things i can recommend and time and keeping yourself as busy as possible with other things. And you should do that for a good period of time. It's going to hurt, but it should get better.

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that is so sad.... I am worried about you - yeah, you can stay in the closet your entire life, but would you really be happier to be married to a man and living your life as a lie? if you love her and she loves you, why not just go for it. it is no one else's business. there are many places in the world that are very accepting. would you really be happier married to a man, having sex with him, all the while feeling that you are hiding a big part of your life?

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she has more of a problem with it than i do. if she was into it i would be there. but she took her keys back from me and packed all my stuff and kicked me out. she hasn't called in four days even though i've left a message. i have to see her tomorrow and i'm scared to see what happens.

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I'm sorry she's so adamant.

There's not much you can do but hunker down and take it one day at a time. It's a shame if she's doing this just from fearing an open relationship.

If she's through, letting go will help you start recovering sooner. I hope tomorrow is a better day for you. Try to eat something semi-healthy and drink lots of water. It's too easy to get dehydrated and end up with headaches and weakness on top of feeling like crap. Coffee and cigs aren't a meal. Hot showers can help you sleep easier.

 

Be good to yourself.

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