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Did i do the right thing....


Tshwane
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Background

 

i've been doing on/off nc with my ex, but i realised that i wasn't getting anywhere and went on nc again. After about 10 days she calls "to find out if im still alive". It was a good chat and 2 days later i text her asking what she's doing for the weekend. She responds by saying she's going to visit her sister but can she come through and say hi if i don't mind.

 

Well she came(Yesterday0 and we talked, had a good time, even kissed a couple of times. When we said goodbye i asked if she still feels the same way("we cant be in relationship because of too much garbage"). She said yes, i then dropped a bomb and told her unless she want's to discuss our relationship i'm not interested in seeing her again nor do i want her as part of my life. She didn't respond just nodded, avoided eye contact(does that when she's hurt) and we said our final bye's and she drove off.

 

I just need reassurance, in my heart & head i feel i did the right thing. I feel like im moving on and unless she wants me back and says so i'd rather nott see her again.

 

Thought???

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your destiny belongs to you, and you alone. however... the next time you need to say something like that, you might feel less divided afterward if you don't present it as a heavy-handed ultimatum; e.g., "if you ever want to seriously discuss our relationship, i'll be somewhere around."

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Tshwane I did the same exact thing and feel like you. I'll be intrested in reading the replies here. I feel like i DID do the right thing but that it hurts real bad because having her gone from my life like that after being with her and sharing everything is a shock.

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Background

 

She said yes, i then dropped a bomb and told her unless she want's to discuss our relationship i'm not interested in seeing her again nor do i want her as part of my life. She didn't respond just nodded, avoided eye contact(does that when she's hurt) and we said our final bye's and she drove off.

 

I just need reassurance, in my heart & head i feel i did the right thing. I feel like im moving on and unless she wants me back and says so i'd rather nott see her again.

 

Thought???

 

My friend, I feel as if you've done exactly the right thing. Which sometimes hurts, but in the long run, whichever the outcome it will be for the best.

 

It's obviously she wants you in her life, and that you are important. Whatever that want entails or how important you are however, only she knows. And I think, she needs a little time to figure this out.

 

Just sit back, and . . . move on, and . . . wait. If that makes sense.

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I was in the same situation at you T...

 

My ex broke up with me a year ago. I was on/off NC, but it was only causing more hurt. Throughout that time, she maintained her want to remain friends. I finally realized I just couldn't do it anymore. She cried, as it obviously still hurts her even to this day. But, you and I have to do what is best for us now. It's been 2 months of NC, and I don't regret my decision ONE BIT. She even messaged me a couple weeks ago, and I didn't respond. I don't know yet what her intentions of messaging me were, but I know that unless she is banging down my door, begging me back, it's NC ALL THE WAY.

 

You made the right decision. You have all the support you need right here...

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I am starting the NC again after she has said she wants to be friends. It is no way to live a life always waiting for the other person to call or write just so you can be disappointed again. I have to agree, unless she comes to my door and says she desperatly needs me back, I am not going to have contact with her. I know it sounds like a game, but sometimes it what you got to do.

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