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WOW - Shocking revelations...


surfn
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Wow. I am completely amazed at people.

 

There was this girl I was close friends with for several years. We kind of dated but it was mostly friends with benefits. She was in love with me and still is. I haven't seen her for awhile since I moved. She calls/texts often and most of the time I don't answer. However, recently I've been talking to her. She begs to come see me or offers to fly me to where she is. She says all these things about how much she misses me and in not so many words that she loves me.

 

She says she's tried going on dates with other guys but when anything physical starts to happen, she just can't do it. She paints the picture that she's lonely and can't find a decent guy. She tries to be so romantic with me, but she knows I don't want that with her. But she e-mails me all the time, calls me all the time, texts me all the time...

 

Years ago when I met this girl I liked her because she wasn't promiscuous. She'd had only been with two people. She was a sweet girl. I've been mean to her at times and she's done a few mean things to me over the years.

 

Some of her friends are wild, trashy girls. Hard drugs, sex with lots of people, neglecting their kids, in and out of jails -- Jerry Springer all the way. However, she distinguishes herself from them and acts all good.

 

Today I logged on to her Myspace page on a whim. I've never checked her messages because I don't really care (I've had her password for a year and logged on twice including today). However, today I was curious because she's been again confessing her love for me for the past month.

 

I know it's a bad thing, a violation of trust, etc but...

 

WOW! She has turned in to an enormous SL-T. She's having sex with all sorts of people. apparently she's had sex with 10+ people this year. In 2-days of on her myspace, she was talking to 5-10 guys about sex.

 

The bad thing is, one guy (who's a mutual friend) she's declaring her love for and being all romantic with him. Saying how much she loves talking to him on the phone, yet she has multiple sex-related messages with other guys.

 

The other bad thing is, apparently after hooking up with all these different guys, she calls me late at night to talk to me, again all romantic.

 

There's some crazy messages I read. So unbelievable. I feel like I'm in shock. She's even hooked up with one of her real trashy, extremely sl-tty (been with 100s of guys, orgies) friend's ex who she talks bad about all the time.

 

It's funny, we talk about how depressing society is with so many scandalous people, how sad it is for families, for their kids, all the lies, drugs, neglect -- so sad. It's at epidemic porportions.

 

I guess you never know a person until you read their Myspace. The point is, 99% of all girls and all guys lie, cheat, and deceive. You have a better chance of winning the lottery than finding a loyal person. Maybe I'm jaded, but it seems that the idea of monogamy and true love is lost in a world of temptation, selfishness, and out right deception.

 

P.S. - I realize I'm a bad person for reading the girl's Myspace page. I'm not jealous either, it's not about me and her. It's just about how people say one thing, want one thing, but do the exact opposite.

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I guess you never know a person until you read their Myspace.

 

Heh. This is true.

 

You could find out a lot of stuff you didn't want to know assuming what they say is true.

 

Even if they're making up half of the stuff on their page you know they're a liar. And who they are projecting themselves as- how they want to be percieved tells a lot about a person. So they want people to think of them as a * * * * or easy? Even if they're not and just like the image I'd still lose respect for that person.

 

The point is, 99% of all girls and all guys lie, cheat, and deceive. You have a better chance of winning the lottery than finding a loyal person. Maybe I'm jaded, but it seems that the idea of monogamy and true love is lost in a world of temptation, selfishness, and out right deception.

 

I think that's a bit of an exaggeration. You're probably only feeling that way because one girl lied to you. I'm sure there's plenty of women who feel the same way about men and would be happy to find a guy who values honesty and being with only one person.

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Hmm, so you feel ok trashing these women you dated but you sleeping with several women, cheating on them - all of that is somehow reasonable and justified?

 

Luckily the people I know as friends and the select people with whom I've been romantically involved are all people of integrity, morals and solid values. And I am sure they are not in the "1%" you refer to.

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I deleted the other posts for privacy issues. I never cheated on the first girl. I was up front the entire time that we weren't "together". We weren't mutually exclusive, we weren't dating, and we weren't promiscuous. The second girl, I was casually dating but later the relationship became serious and I was faithful.

 

I also never claimed that I was right or wrong. They were saying they loved someone while at the same time seeking out multiple random sex partners. I never did that.

 

When both girls started dating in high school, they had very conservative beliefs about sex. Now in their early 20s, they both seem to be having and have had very wild stages.

 

Heck, what I did violated their privacy and is a bad thing, plus I made lots of other mistakes. What amazed me was how shockingly different some people are from what you think (same for the perception of myself). And how even when people believe and say they're in love with someone, they'll still do stupid and selfish things (myself included).

 

Can love be real and dishonest at the same time? One of the greatest experiences in life can also be the source of the worse things in life because people just can't resist.

 

I'm sure your friends are awesome, loyal people who do have integrity. But the real truth is LOTS of guys cheat and LOTS of girls cheat. People are fallible, they decieve whether a lot or a little. Everyone has secrets and the truth would shock you.

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This girl could very well be in love with you. Or at least thinks she is in love with you. Deep down she probably knows she doesnt have a future with you, it seems you've made this pretty clear to her. Her sleeping with these other guys sounds to me like a low self-esteem issue, i think she just craves affection and male attention. And yes at the end of the day, you shouldnt have checked her messages...but....she shouldnt have given you her password either!

I'd just move on and forget about this, but please dont tar all women with the same brush! Not all of us are liars and sleep around!

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You seem highly judgmental - not a great attribute to have in a relationship. I am selective about the people I affiliate with - their "secrets" are of course their secrets - I care about actions towards others and whether those actions are kind, compassionate, thoughtful and are done with common sense. I don't walk around with a mindset that people are bad or have "shocking" secrets - that's a waste of time and belongs on Jerry Springer and the like, in my humble opinion.

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You seem highly judgmental - not a great attribute to have in a relationship. I am selective about the people I affiliate with - their "secrets" are of course their secrets - I care about actions towards others and whether those actions are kind, compassionate, thoughtful and are done with common sense. I don't walk around with a mindset that people are bad or have "shocking" secrets - that's a waste of time and belongs on Jerry Springer and the like, in my humble opinion.

 

I agree. Why do you even care? You didn't like her in the first place...it sounds to me like you have an unnecessary "holier than thou" attitude. You want to elevate yourself above her even more when she already threw her dignity away by admitting to someone like you that she loved you?

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