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Still having trust issues


nadine_3110
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Ok I know that someone had told me that I should wait two weeks and just watch him and see what he does, the little gestures to say he cares, and I know it's only been two days, but I couldn't do it. On Monday, I was done school at 9h30 at night like usual, I checked my phone, he didn't call or text. So I texted him at 10 saying Hi. He didn't answer till about quarter to 10. Then yesterday, I lost my phone for most of the day, found it after work at 9h30 and no calls from him, no texts. I was so down. So I called and he was at a friend's house. What the hell? He can take the time to see his friend but not me. So I cried on the phone, telling him it was really hard to trust that he won't leave. He said he wouldn't. But he left once, how can I believe that he won't do it again. And he said that it annoyed him when I asked if our relationship was still good, when I asked how he felt about me. Well I just like to hear it. Why can't he understand, I need reassurance, I know I shouldn't need it, but I do. He said that when I doubt his feelings, it sounds like I'm doubting my own for him. This just sucks, so thanks for listening and hopefully responding to my ranting. I know I'm being super annoying with this and I'm sorry.

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I completely understand how you feel.

 

But you need to try to get over your worry of breaking up again, cause seriously, that alone WILL cause him to leave again.

 

It's not that easy though. If he left once, he could very well leave again. But part of taking him back means that you have to forgive him for what he did. You can't hang on to what happened in the past if you really want things to work out this time.

 

I think you are just insecure with everything. Can you understand how he might be feeling though? He came back and you took him back and now you are making him pay for what he did. That's not fair at all.

 

In my opinion, if you really can't 100% trust him, then it's not going to work. Honestly, he can't promise you that he won't leave you.. but he can promise that it's not his intention to ever hurt you.

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I totally empathise with all the feelings and emotions you are experiencing at the moment.

 

However, i do think Meow18 is correct. This will ruin your relationship if you don't let go of the past. If you don't trust him - there will be no future and you may as well save yourself the pain and anguish and finish it.

 

Hard - but true.

 

A relationship is nothing if not buildt on solid foundations. Trust is the biggest foundation a relationship should have.

 

Remember: what are big things to us i.e him not phoning or texting - aren't big things to them. He's chilled with you and chilled with his emotions of how he feels for you. By you doubting him you will make him question his feelings.

 

take a massive STEP back....and think about what you want.

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