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I'm on the verge of breaking NC... please HELP!!!


Blane151211
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Here's my story:

 

(this thread contains my detailed story)

 

I've been NC for almost 2wks now. My ex went NC almost a week before I went NC. The first few days of being NC was very hard on me... but then I took it on a day to day basis and was able to do it... now, it's almost 2weeks of NC for me. Last Thursday was the first month since he dumped me... he just left me a voicemail. Didn't really offer me any explanation except for the fact that he blamed me for a lot of things and he left me hurtful and harsh words. Last Thursday, it's been a month since he dumped me... but I did good. I was happy and went out at different times with some of my friends. However, since yesterday (Friday), I've been miserable. There's not a moment that his thoughts will come to mind. I really do miss him a LOT!!! I wonder if he thinks of me too and if he misses me too. I wanted to break NC and call him... please HELP!!! I wanted to get over him... I know it's better for me to be NC because it will help me a lot to heal... but I couldn't resist missing him... please HELP!!!

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Blane, I understand how hard this is for you.

If you break NC or not is finally your decision.

 

Maintaining NC will help your healing, but it may be hard to maintain NC

at times. You will have moments of weakness. You may falter-we all do.

 

Remember he could contact you if he wanted to-he has your number I presume? If you do decide to break NC keep it short and sweet-maybe

just a quick "Hi how are you doing?" If he secretly misses you too it

will be an invitation to re-establish dialogue if that's what you want.

If you don't receive a reply you can just resume NC.

 

All the best, and whatever you decide hope it works out well and we'll all support you.

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If you come to these boards to question whether or not to break NC, then you shouldn't.

 

You shouldn't even have to consider the fact that ur on NC to consider to break it. It takes a long time of healing before you can consider talking being talking, rather than "No contact is over!"

 

Cuz its never really over. Its the hard truth, but if you want to heal from this, you may never speak to him again. Hell I haven't spoken to an ex of mine that I had a VERy VEEERY difficult time getting over... Its been almost 3 years now. She has called and I have avoided... even 3 years hasn't healed me completely.

 

-ForAnother

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Step away from the phone...

 

You are doing great. You may sometimes have strong urges to contact your ex. If you ride them out, they will lessen over time. If you give into them, the cycle will start over. Just remember how difficult things were in the very beginning and how, over the last few days you have been feeling better. Ride out this urge and it will be easier as time goes on.

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Step away from the phone...

 

You are doing great. You may sometimes have strong urges to contact your ex. If you ride them out, they will lessen over time. If you give into them, the cycle will start over. Just remember how difficult things were in the very beginning and how, over the last few days you have been feeling better. Ride out this urge and it will be easier as time goes on.

 

 

I woke up at 3AM today only to find myself thinking about him, the relationship, what was and what could have been, what went wrong, etc. I realized how much I miss him and how much I wanted him back. I really felt the urge of contacting him. I don't have his number on my cellphone anymore... but I still have it somewhere. I wanted to send him a text message and beg once more. You see, he doesn't want to talk to me or to see me. He probably is avoiding the fact that he may need to explain why he ended the relationship. I don't know...

Anyway, instead of texting him, I texted some of my friends and told them how emotionally I feel so weak. I told them I miss my ex so much. I received an immediate reply from one of them saying I should think how much he hurted me. The other one replied telling me that if I wanted to talk about it, we can meet sometime today. I didn't text or call my ex... not yet... the urge is still there... but I am fighting it with all the best that I can do.

I know that if I call or text him, he will just ignore me... if that happens, I know that it will only add up to all my pains right now... and I hate to start all over again.

Thanks so much for your kind words everyone... I really need your HELP and encouragement...

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Hi Blane,

 

Stay strong! I read your other post. This guy is bad news to you.

 

So don't give in! Find other things to do like watching movies, or do some exercises. Anything to keep your mind off him. You could do it. Do it for your own happiness.

 

Thank you so much!!! All the people around me who knows about him says the same thing... he's a bad news for me. And I wasn't treated right although I was at the losing end of the relationship from the very beginning and I was the one who was hurt so badly when it ended.

I'm really weak right now... but I am fighting the urge to contact him.

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It's great that you have supportive friends that are there for you. Take advantage of the fact that you can reach out to them when you feel weak. Just make sure you spread it around a bit.

 

Hang tough... it's going to get better. Take pride in the fact that you are doing your best to move on with dignity... that takes a tremendous amount of strength... a strength you will be able to rely upon in the future when you need it.

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