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Have you experienced this?


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I seem to get the most clarity first thing in the morning. I am about 4 weeks out of a two year relationship and now I can see where the

thing wasn't working. She was always analyzing the relationship, you know, taking its temperature every hour.. comparing it to her previous loves, saying things like: I always run

away when it gets too emotionally intense..saying things like, "dating is so hard, why does it have to be so hard.?"


When I get honest with myself I recognize how restless I was with her and how she was kind of rigid in her behavior. Not much spontanaity. Once we got going, she was a great lover, but it was like I had to break her down every time to get her to let go. I like a woman to seduce me

once in a while. SHe never did this. I made lots of mistakes and I take responsibility for them, Oh well, comments?

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I think its easy to look back on people that we broke up with and point out their faults... but if we were with them... we would acknowledge they had faults, but just accepted it.


Everyone, efven in the most perfect loving relationship can admit that their partner has thigns wrong with them.. but when we break up with someone or osmeone breaks up with us... its easy to point out those things and use them as a " well I guess it woudln't have worked out anyway"..


I think (especially from the person who got dumped) it helps us move on by looking at all the things wrong with them.


I can look at my mum or my best friend adn there are some things that are extremely annoying about them... but I love them both to bits more than anyone else in the world

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Sounds to me like your ex-girlfriend wasn't very emotionally mature, at least when it came to relationships. For some people, they can be a tough thing to navigate, and years later, they realize how difficult they made it for themselves.


It's generally something they have to discover on their own, though.

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