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I was dumped by my b/f of over 1 year, 6/4/06. A little history, we belong to the same social/outdoor group, and he doesn't want to have anything to do with me, although he gave lip service to the 'friends' crap. I just now feel as though i'm finally moving on, and i see him signed up for an outdoor adventure with 'new woman'. what could i do. it broke my heart to actually see it, though it's probably better to see the names together than to run into the happy couple. why is my heart breaking all over again? i don't want him back, but geesh....

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Well, its important to understand that you have come to a dead-end road as far as him concerns. Is there any way to stop all these heart ackes? Personally if i where you id stay out of the whole dating scene to pick up the broken pieces of your heart, to glue them back together again, and give yourself time to heal before you move on.

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weird how some things take us back to a place where we thought we'd left...its almost like our hearts play little games on us...

 

You are over him...but it still hurts when you know they've moved on...its like a twist of the knife, but with no explaination....don't try and find reasoning why you feel the way you do. just accept it...like you done the last time...and you will be less bothered by anything that happens with him in the future....

 

xx

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thanks all. no, this has been my group for over 5 years. we have over 2000 members. there is no way i'm going to let him push me out of a club that i love. i feel much better today. it's almost like you can't believe someone is dead until you see the body. well, yesterday i saw the body. and today, it feels pretty good. i didn't want him back, i just then knew, 150% that he didn't want me back. which feels good. and now that he has a new g/f, i know that he won't approach me at events for idle chit chat. i simply want nothing to do with him at this point. so actually, it all turned out for the best. and i hate link removed. can't stand it, i've never met anyone worth dating on that site....and i started when it was email removed....i'm very particular, and i want to fall in love the old fashioned way....over a campfire with a marshmello on a stick! ha!

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you know, I have a funny story.

 

A friend of mine is also part of a club like that, and a few weeks ago, they had a big camping trip. Not only was her ex going, but he was taking along the girl that he cheated on my friend with! And to make things worse, my friend and her ex were scheduled to carpool together! And even worse, she was feeling super sick that weekend.

 

I told her, "honey, don't go, just crawl into bed, pull the covers over you, and don't go!" she said, "no, I can't, everyone already knows i'm going to be there. I wouldn't have signed up if I knew they were going though!"

 

so... she went against my advice, and she met a new man, a guy who is now her boyfriend! if she had stayed home, she would have never met him! Apparently her ex got really jealous and made a play for her, but my friends reaction was... "

 

So, then just stay in the club, and maybe stay on the other end of the campsite as your ex

 

but it can't hurt checking out a few other clubs also... don't ditch this club, but maybe look at a few others....

 

good luck

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Sympathy for you, 25thfloor... You know, finding about my ex's new girlfriend 4 months after he dumped me was so hard on me that I labeled my journal entries from that period "Getting Re-Dumped," because that's what it felt like.

 

It's great to know that you feel 150% over him now, but I'd still watch out for those annoying "breakdown" days when the over-it feeling seems rather absent and the desperate wish to be back with the ex returns for a quick visit. If these days do come, don't feel preoccupied about your emotions; just feel them and let it go.

 

Kudos to you for being strong and refusing to let your fear and pain keep you away from what you truly enjoy. This is courage in its purest form. Best wishes.

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