Lack of Sexual activity.....

[cryingeyez]

Hey if she is not acting very interested in you and you have other women that are interested in you theni would go for it. If she was interested in you then she would try to touch you and want to be with you . you know what i mean?

[dogheadma]

It looks like you two are at an impass due to the fact that you are not getting the sex you really wanted and expected. You have made this known to her and she's not willling to discuss it. Maybe she's a virgin and is scared. Maybe she's with someone else. Maybe she dosen't like sex. You have no way of knowing because she won't tell you. If this is a major issue for you then you need to decide what's best for you. It's no more fair for you to lead her on than it is for her to do the same to you.

[Mun]

I think it's time to move on. She's not interested in what you want or need and she isn't changing her mind nor talking about it. What more do you want?

 

Time to let go and cut your losses. you guys might just not be compatible or she might just be feeling too much pressure and witholding out of anger/resentment/hurt....you just don't know since she ain't talking. it's just not working buddy, maybe you should let her go.

 

how old are you guys?

[AntiLove_SuperStar]

That's..odd.

 

In my personal opinion, sex should get BETTER as you progress and know each other better. My boyfriend of 1 year have sex about 8+ times a week (and that's only 1-2 nights). It's NOT to be annoying, just to illustrate that I think something's gone very wrong here.

 

You must talk about it before she starts to use it as a tool for manipulating you, as it's a distinct possibility. If you do other stuff for her she may, to be blunt, just be *using you*, and is no longer attracted to you sexually.

[candy604]

ask her about this, ask her about her values and whether she thought the relationship was going to fast? maybe she has some past she's hiding from you. do you two talk about your relationship? she should be open and honest if anything bothers her. Some girls just hide it and it comes out negatively.

 

tell her you need to talk about the relationship and ask her what's bothering her etc....if you get no where, take a break from the relationship..

 

You sound like a wonderful man by the way.

 

ask..i used to be all over my bf but then it stopped after a while b/c things just annoyed me to bits n i was angry almost all the time with him.

[Mun]

HUh? You never actually had sex???

 

Well then it llooks like you expected sex because she liked you and messed around with you. You invested your time and effort into the relationship and now you want what you feel is DUE to you.

 

That's a turn off.

 

I bet your girlfriend is reading into this and wondering if that was your motivation all along. Or if you are now wanting it because it's due to you and once you get it you would leave. That's what I'd be thinking and I'd witholding too. Hey, she has a right NOT to have sex with you if she doesn't want too, she even has a right to change her mind if she EVER did plan on having sex with you.

 

Do you love this girl? I just don't believe a guy who loves his girl would pressure her so much and be so angry about all this.

 

My guess is you guys just move at a different pace. Like I said before, maybe it's time to find someone who wants and expects the same kind of relationship you do. This one is just not working for you hun.

 

What do you think?

[tangovito]

so, you didnt have sex with her....is THAT the problem???

Also, does it mean that you dont "help yourself"? How about her??? Any encroachment of private space[did she see you doing that alone]???? these are hard questions.....

i think it would be nice if you and your trusted friend who is a girl/lady honestly takes interest in you and does a role play drama to explore further....i think there is a problem but couldnt put my fingers on it....

[chawncee]

I just think that none of this is supposed to be THIS complicated. Either you want to or you dont. If you dont then all I'm saying is that I deserve enough for her to talk to me about it. I'm leaving out ALOT of things that we share together and with the exception of this, everything is pretty perfect. She gets 150% communication from me. She gets 150% respect from me. While I may sound very frustrated and angry in here, I give her the upmost repsect when I do decide to discuss this topic which by the way is not that often. Its not like I'm throwing this up in her face every single night. All I'm saying is that a woman cannot just make everything work for her and forget about what makes it cool for me. There isn't ANYTHING on this planet that I wouldn't do for this woman INCLUDING waiting. And even if she did tell me what the problem is, all I'm gonna do is hold her hand, tell her that everything is gonna be alright and we are gonna walk this path TOGETHER. its just not fair to decide to do something that ONLY works for you especially if the person that you are with is telling you the it is CLEARLY making them uncomfortable. Thats all I'm saying. Thats what she gets from me, why am I not supposed to get the same thing? I would never ask her to do anything just b/c I want it. Why do you think we are having this conversation? When she told me 5 months or so ago that she wasn't ready yet I had NO PROBLEM with that b/c I wanted to prove to her that sex was not the only thing that I'm in this for. Now, with all of the things that we share together, for ANYONE to imply that I'm only out for sex is TOTALLY disrespcetful to me. If it was all about me, I would be gone by now. If it was all about sex, I would be gone by now. Its about caring for eachother, its about repsecting eachother, its about having fun, its about protecting eachother, its about providing for eachother, its about loving and understanding eachother, AND its about PLEASING one another.

 

Its about ALL of these things, not just what makes it "convenient" for you....

[Mun]

If you aren't getting what you need from this relationship then it's not working for you. Including the fact she is not communication with you. She is not cosidering your feelings.. why stick around?

 

You have to ask yourself Why am I still hanging on?

 

focus back on you and you may get some clarity

[chawncee]

I'm in this BECAUSE I love this woman. It just hurts that she is making me feel like she doesn't feel the same way. The part where resentment is starting to build up is where I'm here for her in spite of the flaws that she has. I'm here for her inspite of everything that I'm not getting. Why cant I get the same thing? I know I'm not perfect. No one is, but if she "loves" me like she says that she does, why all of the smoke screens. This is not me saying, "if you love me then you will sleep with me". This is me saying, "We have a problem and I feel that we should talk about it b/c there is something wrong and you wont tell me what it is". I've said 2 million times to her that I would take this approach regardless of what the problem was. This just happens to be the topic. But at the end of the day, how am I supposed to take this seriously when I know that she's not being str8 with me? I'm hanging around hoping that things work themselves out but my gut is telling me that I'm getting played....

[Mun]

Trust your gut.

 

If she is not talking then you don't have much to go on. You can't fix it if she is not allowing you to. I don't know about getting played, but it does sound to me like your patience is wearing thin and you are resenting her for it. Not exactly a loving relationship in my book.

 

I had a friend once who preferred to stay angry with me instead of telling me what I'd done to upset her. She just would not discuss it. Her argument what that I'd said it so I had meant it. I found out later that many times she had misinterpreted something I'd said and really she was just very very sensitive about some things. It was draining.

I dumped her.