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I don't believe a word she says or a thing she does


pacopaco
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I can't get over the feeling that she dislikes me and that is why she cheated. I'm having a hard time letting go of the thought that she's having a ball with all her co-workers, and having the time of her life, even though it is contrary to what she has told me. she's told me that her life is the opposite, that she made the biggest mistake of her life, but i can't believe it. why is this?

a friend of mine told me that if she didn't regret what she did, she would have stepped out of my life after doing what she did. she would have just removed herself, disappeared, but she hasn't. my friend told me that she doesn't know how to communicate getting me back. I am so full of distrust, that my thinking is that she wants me around for when things go bad.

been trying to use my head and not my heart, but my head is just as messed up right now over it. I've been doind NC, and it's working great, but even the three phone messages i got last week hurt me. I didn't return any calls. I don't know what to do, which is ok, but i don't believe a word she says, and i truly believe that she is a liar, and her life is a wonderful parade.

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It sounds to me that your perception is scewed, for example why would she leave 3 phone messages if her life was just one big parade. There are many reasons why she has regret but that doesnt mean that you should give her the benefit of the doubt. The infidelity was her issue and not yours. You decide how you want to play your cards next.

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It sounds to me that your perception is scewed, for example why would she leave 3 phone messages if her life was just one big parade. There are many reasons why she has regret but that doesnt mean that you should give her the benefit of the doubt. The infidelity was her issue and not yours. You decide how you want to play your cards next.

 

it's true my perception is screwed. She wants to come over sometimes, and i can't figure out why. i tell her i'm busy. I don't know if she wants to see me, or come over so she can forget the mess that is her life (according to her) for a few hours in what used to be "our place." I just feel that whatever is going on with her, it is dishonest to me. and iam having the hardest time believing any and everything she says, but at the same time, she hasn't backed off, and i've told her to. friends say to me "maybe it's because..." and "perhaps..." i'm tired of maybes, and perhaps.

It's almost like my ex misses me, and is dying to be with me, and then doesn't know what to do or say when she shows up but talk about how bad things are for her. I don't buy it, and i feel that i don't have to be as sweet as i've been, love or no love.

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i've always been of the opinion that anything is fixable. solutions always present themselves. if i could trust her, and believe her, I don't know that i'd take her back in a romantic sense, but maybe we can continue to know each other. I don't believe she is malicious, i think she Screwed Up. i've told her this, and before i even did say "Let's fix this, and we may learn to be a stronger couple." this where i think her life is a big party. she won't commit to working anything out with me, even if it's to say 'No, thanks i'm outta here." but she keeps calling, and wanting to come over. i don't see what it is she is holding on to. I asked her to let me go, and she said she couldn't, not realizing she let me go on New Year's Eve.

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The cut to the bottom line. Tell her that if she wants to get back together with her you are willing to talk about how that might be done. Otherwise stop calling you - and enforce that. Block her etc. Most importantly stop talking to her friends about her.

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I am so sorry Pacopaco. Honestly, If you feel she is screwed up & a liar. I think you should keep her out of your life. Because everytime she steps back in you hurt again.

And honestly I believe that you sound like a good, sweet, Genuine, man. someone worthy of the best from a women, someone better (someone who wouldn't have ever cheated) ((hugs))Everything happens for a reason.And God brings good out of everything. Stay strong & keep your eyes to the light.

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Pacopaco,

 

I have followed your threads,

 

And this woman just misses you because you took control,

 

And took her out of your life,

 

As the cheater, she has lost all rights to her heart,

 

She doesn't love you because if she did,

 

She would have never cheated on you,

 

You deserve far better than her sub-part treatment,

 

Please do not let her back in your life,

 

Her morals are completely astrew,

 

Remember she left you for her boss,

 

The next chance she gets to cheat,

 

She will take it and leave you sad and upset,

 

Don't let that happen,

 

Hugs,

 

Rose

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thank you all for all that. I have told her everything, and i mean everything. I talked with her and said "let's make this work," and then i said "please don't call me." I even told her that she was the biggest disappointment of my life. nothing works. i don't know what to do. she's persistent, but for what? if she came to my door and said she was glad she cheated and she hates me, well that i could work with, or if she came over and said she really wants me back, i can work with that too, but she comes or calls with nothing., and i don't get it, and i don't want any part of her madness.her head is floating, and it ends up killing me. she's all messed up, and i'm at my wit's end.

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i don't talk to her friends. it was my friend i was talking to. Yeah, I've done all the call blocking and all of that. I got rid of my IM simply because I have everyone's phone number that i need/want to contact. it's crazy.

I just wish it wouldn't run me into the ground. I can talk to her, but not with the way she's coming at me, meaning, with nothing.

in my opinion, i don't think reality has hit her. it's been 9 months, and her behavior is the same. I told her that she was still stuck in February. she agreed.

with all of the things she tells me, it's strange that she doesn't see it for herself.

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sorry about your divorce, britnus. i'm sure it's tough. for me it isn't even about a false hope so much as it is about having a backbone. she doesn't have one. I just feel sh should come out and say whatever it is she wants. if it's to be back, if it's friends, or a sex buddy, whatever. i think that maybe she has the false sense of hope.

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it is a rollercoaster, britnus, and i want off. she could be telling the truth about everything, but that isn't the point. I don't believe her. my heart is against it, as much as i'd like to. sometimes i feel i am neing used as a comfort. she used to live here with me, ao i think she likes to come over and escape her troubles, even if it is only for a few hours. i don't like it, and i can't deal with it.

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