what do you think?

[crazybouthim]

So... I've been seeing this guy since November or so... and I dont know... I havent really been feeling "appreciated" or something. Sometimes I feel that our relationship is so young that we should be in the "crazy in love" stage where we cant get enough of one another, taking pics 24:7, having sex all days long... maybe I'm just living in some kind of fantasy world. Anyway, we were laying in bed today and I asked him if he appreciated me and the things I do... and of course, he said yes, but then somehow, we got into the topic of "i want the rest of the world to look at us and be jealous and think we are so amazing together." Well, thats what I told him I wanted. Unfortunately, he didnt feel the same way. He said he didnt want "that" right now because with his ex-gf, he jumped into things with her, fell head over heels, and didnt really even get to know the person first so the relationship turned out badly for them. I guess I can totally understand if he wants to get to know one another first before being "crazy in love." I just feel like there is something wrong or maybe I'm just being totally crazy right now... I just need some advice. Myabe I'm just being stupid and our relationship is actually perfect... I should stop thinking of the future so much and just live in the moment? I mean, nothing is set in stone and I need to stop thinking ahead or at least, thinking so much.

[Scout]

I just read your other thread, and I have to say, I think your intuition is trying to say something very loudly to you here: that your guy is not as emotionally invested - by far - in this relationship as you are.

 

For example, you two live together. And you're still in the getting to know each other phase? And speaking of you two living together, didn't he come home the other night to suggest you move in with his sister?

 

Look, I hate to say this...but it does seem to me that maybe you shouldn't think about the future too much with this guy...because I have a feeling he's not going to be in it. He does not seem to view your relationship the way you do, and he's had plenty of time to get over an ex.

[annie24]

sadly, I agree with scout....

 

I think your boyfriend has a point about taking things slow and not "falling in love with an image", but I think you two kind of nullified that when you moved in together.

 

and if he's suggesting you move in with his sister. I say don't do it. Move out, by yourself, or one of your friends. Take a step back from the relationship.

 

i think your gut is telling you this situation isn't right. i definitely think you should move out. if things were "perfect", he wouldn't have "suggested" you move in with his sister.

 

good luck

[Momene]

It's the old classic that he's just not as into you as you are into him.

 

You should accept the possibility (probability) that he just won't figure in your long term plans.