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"rough sex"


cinderelly65
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Hmmm, I think being silent is not a good thing. Communication is key especially when you are intimate with someone. What is he like out of the bedroom?

 

If this is something that freaks you out you must express to him your feelings. If he gets upset or angry about it then you know right now he is not the one for you. Sex should be something both parties are in agreeance on, be it rough or sensual.

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I am in agreement with WNP. You certainly need to convey to him your concerns.

 

I am not making any excuse of his being rough with you, but is it possible that it was just the excitement of having sex with you for the first time. Maybe he was a bit over zealous with the sexual activity.

 

You could possibly tell him that you really like things when it's a bit slower and gentler. Communication about this is definitely in order.

 

Also , as WNP as already asked, What is he like under general circumstances? Is he aggressive in any other aspect of your relationship?

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Sounds like a classic 'over zealous' scenerio...i also think some men think that rough sex impresses us, sadly it isn't normally the case...

 

Communicate with him definitely...if that doesn't work there are things you can do to slow him down....like go on top and work it slowly, if he is on top, lower your pelvis and push your hands on his hips to slow the thrusting...

 

I think this is a talk thing...he will think he is being 'great' and only you can tell him other wise...it won't dent his ego if done in the correct way - promise.

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I have only had one lover who was very aggressive in bed (to the point where almost my whole body was sore the next day) and personally, I enjoyed it (only multiple orgasms I've ever had). Just to be clear I'm not talking about S&M or kink at all, just lots of "energy"?

 

I think that you should talk to him and take his response into consideration with his other personality traits to see if this is a "red-flag".

 

I can tell you, the guy who was really rough during sex with me was also an abuser, he was also the strongest man I have ever been with... Has anyone else experienced any parallels between rough sex and abuse?

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