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Should we break up


Michael555
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Hi, I have been dating this girl for about 2 years, she and I have a lot in common and often have a good time together, however we have also had numerous arguments over the course of our relationship, I understand that disagreements are normal however I think we have more than normal and a lot of our arguments are not necessary and I am not interested in getting married to someone that I argue with all the time. Most recently I told her that if the arguments would stop then we would get engaged, things stopped for awhile but have begun to creep back up, and in our last argument I am not happy with her telling me that she believes my mother (who has a medical illness history longer than any AMA publication, she is doing better now) is faking her current condition, also she hates my sisters, and if we were married I would not be able to help my family members if needed(just random stuff-moving boxes, simple home repair etc) we even had one argument over the phone because I asked her to let me call her back because I wanted to go back into my mothers hospital room to say good luck to her before the orderly rolled her away to have some test done......her argument was I just saw the woman, why do I need to see her again before she has some "f-ing" test done. She often has these outburt which will last for a hour or longer before I can get off the phone, but will often (not all the time) call back to apologize in some form, either for what she said or to change her words to what she "really" meant......in any case, please tell me what you guys think, should I continue in this relationship and get engaged or just end it?

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Ask yourself am i with her so she can make me unhappy? Did she go with you so you can make her unhappy? OF COURSE NOT! couples are supposed to make eachother happy. So only put love and light into eachothers lives on a continues basis. Small arguments can lead to BIG break ups, and act as poison to your relationship by putting continues darkness and hatred into eachothers lives, destroying any nice that's left.

 

You see , if she gives a spin to that wheel of hatred by starting an argument , and you decide to give another spin to that wheel of hatred, by calling her something back. Then the wheel of hatred will spin forever!, You If a provocation occurs you need NOT to give another spin to that wheel of hatred, that way it loses the power of its spin,that happens when you say. STOP, to here and no further.

 

If she starts an argument, just pour her with love and light.

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You have raised the concerns with her, she has apologised but continues doing the same thing. I would advise breaking up with her.

 

Anyone who wants to come between a partner and their family is trouble and that behaviour is unlikely to change. It's symptomatic of someone who wants to control their partner and she is much more likely to get worse rather than better,

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  • 2 weeks later...

Wow,

 

I was appalled when I read how awful her response was about your mother. I know that I would never put a man before my family, but I would also not be with a man who was not supportive of me and my family, and who did not back me up when I needed support, or to be there for my family.

 

She sounds just awful, and I am not surprised that you are having doubts about her. I agree with DN that the fact that she is telling you that once you get married that you would not be able to help your family is so selfish and contolling and completely unacceptable.

 

If a guy forced me to make a choice between my family and him, no contest. Buh bye, loser.

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