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Help!Friend tunes out in conversation


Galaxygirl
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I have a male friend that I meet for coffee to discuss politics, things going on in our lives,etc. One thing he will do, though, that really bothers me, is to tune out of our conversation for maybe 10 seconds or so when an attractive woman walks in the room. He will stare at her, then resume the conversation. If I am talking at the time, I feel like I am talking to the wall until he resumes his attention. I usually keep talking during this time, but feel really stupid, because I know he isn't listening. I also think it is rude. Should I just stop talking when he does this, or what?

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Seeing as your his 'friend who is a girl' and not his 'girlfriend', you really have no more say in this than if you were checking out some attractive guy. If it bothers you that much make a comment when he goes off staring, "Earth to friend" or something...

 

...but really, it might be a little rude, but we tolerate flaws in our friends, don't we?

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yeah let me tell you i feel the same way about one of my friends that does that. what i do is wait until i have his full attention and then continue talking. unfortunately guys arent capable of multi-tasking. ie checking out girls and listening or chewing gum and walking. fact of life. over time i realized that theres nothing u can do.

 

if your in the middle of a point, snapping seems to work.

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Depending on your level of closeness with him and if you both share any sort of smart-alec sense of humor, you could try to make your point subtly and humorously by starting to talk about something completely crazy and meaningless when he tunes you out and keep it up until he re-focuses. He will then probably look surprised and think that whatever the heck it is that you are talking about would have made sense if only he'd been listening the entire time. Then you can act surprised that he isn't following you and then hopefully you'll both be laughing, or at least you can have a good-natured laugh at his expense which will get him laughing

 

Obviously you would only know if you both share an appreciation for this kind of humor.

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