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I feel as though I am stuck. Its like I can't move forward, and it is driving me mad, because I want a girlfriend. I go to a very secluded school, where there are only about 100 kids from kindergarten to 12th grade. I've been going there for four years now, and I am a senior. For those four years of high school, there has been only one hot girl there. (On a rating or 1-10, her appearance is about a 6, but her spunky, cheerful, flirtatious attitude seems to rank her up to an 8. But then again, since she is the only hot girl in the school, it's like she is off the chart of 1-10; like she is an 11). So, as you can see, since most of the highschoolers are guys, the competition is way too fierce. Plus, I screwed up with making a good first impression during my first two years knowing her. There are no proms or anything like that at my school either. It is purely an academic school. I seem to have the loner personality. What I mean is that my school is the only source of life outside of my home. I know its totally pathetic, but I have always seemed to find it easier avoiding uncomfortable situations by reading, playing videogames, just keeping to myself. I seem to have a problem of feeling extremely uncomfortable around new situations and people. When in them, I just seem to clam up and become a lot shyer than I really am. It takes time for me to gradually soften up enough to operate normally, and I mean a long time. Like a week or two or three. And, that of course goes against every part of the whole approach I'm supposed to have around girls. In order to succeed with them, you need to, on your first time seeing the girl, walk up to them once you see them, and in a very confident manner. You then need to say "Hey" to get their attention. From there you need to just start building up rapport. If a hot girl that I spot is standing alone (which they almost always are not… they are usually surrounded by either girls, guys, or a mix) Although a little hard, I can walk up to the girl confidently and say "hey". Anyone can do that. The problem is what to say after that. I seem to just stand there, raking my brain to come up with something, and by the time I finally can, the hot girl has lost interest. And, like I said that's only if they are alone. If they are in a group, I totally don't know what to do, because they are usually in the middle of a conversation with each other. And upon walking up to the group, I have no idea what they are talking about, and I can't really ask them because they don't know who I am. I of course know that I need to get out of my 'live in my room mode' and out into the real world. Otherwise, I have no right to complain. And so, today I went to my churches youth group for the fist time, hoping to meet some hot girl's I could practice on. And when I got there, I totally froze in my tracks. I came in with confidence, but the second I got there, everyone was talking amongst themselves. I tried to introduce myself to a couple guy at first to start feeling back to normal, but all I said was my name and they said theirs, and I didn't know what else to say. Its like my head is too slow. So, I just kinda stood there frozen until church began and we sat down. So, basically, that hurt my confidence, and now I want to know where I go from now, and what to do differently so I don't freeze up again. And, also where are some other places that would be helpful for me to try out? Thanks.

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Hey Rekrap-

 

I can relate to how you feel. I was quiet in highschool. I'm definitely not quiet now..lol

 

You sound like a smart guy I'm sure you have a lot of interesting things to say.

 

Join clubs and sports... you will meet and make new friends and also build your self esteem in the process.

 

You should practice getting more comfortable making new friends and then gradually work on approaching a "hot chick" lol

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