Momene Posted September 14, 2006 Share Posted September 14, 2006 It seems that either a lot of people on this board have broken up recently or are just about to. Accepting it's over is the hardest thing and the longer you've been together, the harder it is. One thing that will help is that many of us have been there before and have got through it. Some of what I'm going to say may sound cynical but I'm afraid it's true and based on real observation. Firstly, if you aren't married and don't have kids, there is less reason to cling on to an unsuitable relationship to "make it work". A relationship that needs a lot of work when still in the early stages just isn't worth it and stands VERY little chance of working out long-term. Secondly, someone may appear to be special but there are plenty of people about if you know where to look and "loved ones" can be replaced if you need to. Thirdly, if finding someone else isn't happening or is taking a bit too long, it's better to be alone than be in an unsuitable relationship. Fourthly, although hardly anyone admits it, many people stay in relationships because they will miss the sex. Sex outside of relationships (of which I have VERY little experience) is much more acceptable and obtainable these days and so is masturbation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Momene Posted September 14, 2006 Author Share Posted September 14, 2006 Forgot to mention, as it's still holiday season, try and take a break if you didn't with your recent ex. then have your rebound fling. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dako Posted September 14, 2006 Share Posted September 14, 2006 Mo You seem like you're struggling. I hope you're okay. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
g44 Posted September 14, 2006 Share Posted September 14, 2006 Good judgment comes from experience, and often experience comes from bad judgment. i have this theory that.. people cant make us sad unless they have the power to make us happy too. love is like a small box filled with emotions. jealously, lust, selfishness, rage, bliss, contentment, concern, clarity, attachment, confusion, even hate... all filled into this tiny, compact box. when two people come together to share love, the box starts to shake. at any moment, any of the above emotions could gain enough pressure to spring out and surprise someone. real love consists of any and all possible human emotions... i think that...if you know someone loves you to an extreme level, but you choose that you cant possibly love them, you end up hurting yourself more than you think you will. but if you keep on loving someone that you know cant love you, you're hurting yourself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Momene Posted September 14, 2006 Author Share Posted September 14, 2006 Thanks, Dako. I'm OK but a bit tired. This post is in a reaction to many people who've just split or are scared that a split is about to happen. Fortunately, I'm not one of them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vesper Posted September 14, 2006 Share Posted September 14, 2006 That's great to hear Momene !!! b Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dako Posted September 14, 2006 Share Posted September 14, 2006 Good, Mo. I agree with your post, just wondered. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
doyathink Posted September 14, 2006 Share Posted September 14, 2006 When you know the relationship is over but the money isn't there, it makes it even harder.Knowing you will be living in someones basement while your belongings are in a storage building somewhere sucks! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
g44 Posted September 14, 2006 Share Posted September 14, 2006 i am speechlessss Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Momene Posted September 14, 2006 Author Share Posted September 14, 2006 When you know the relationship is over but the money isn't there, it makes it even harder.Knowing you will be living in someones basement while your belongings are in a storage building somewhere sucks! I agree with you and having been through a divorce, I know what it's like BUT I feel that a lot of couples who aren't living together are giving themselves and each other a lot of grief trying to make something work when they could easily split and both find someone more suitable. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dako Posted September 14, 2006 Share Posted September 14, 2006 Better to be free and alone than suffer a bad pairing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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