how long will it be?

[The_Vacancy]

i am a 14 year old. i have had sort-of girlfriends before. girls that i liked, that liked me, we talked to each other, held hands but nothing more. i once was with a girl i liked, that liked me back and she ended up betraying me to my best mate, and i have never had a girl since in 3 years.

 

i chose not to, because i'm emotionally unstable i guess. or i hold on to people, if i fall for someone, it takes months or even years to get over. and i'm 14, i still cry about girls from year 7. this leaves me to believe that i will go through my entire teenage life without a girl because of this problem.

 

i tell myself not to have a girl until next year, when i might be a little more mature. but not only is it an emotional attachment but a low self esteem and confidence thing. i also don't want to be a guy that has 3 girls a month like everyone else. i planned on a girl i could send flowers to, and hang out with, i could send her cards and spend the day at the beach.

 

but it seems i won't and every single time i see a couple my age holding hands, it breaks me. thinking that i could have a girl, if i had confidence. if i was a little stronger with my feelings, if i was someone more.

 

i have been asked out before, and i feel terrible for saying no. because some of the girls i truly would go out with. i just want to be ready, and i want a girl i could love and be loved by. a girl i could hold in my arms if she was feeling down, will this ever happen?

 

am i doomed to be that little shy kid in the corner with no girl?

 

because i don't want to be. and i know i can be something better, it's just hard.

 

does anyone have some ideas on how to step up, and tell the girl straight up i like her, rather then hiding behind my own shadow.

 

thank you.

[SkylinesTurnstiles]

Oh thats so sweet!

Well ( i know i say this often but..)when you think you like somone again become there friend or if not that smile at them whem your eyes meet.Your obvously a sensitive guy and heaps of girls love that.Show them who are

[Acer]

Oh thats so sweet!

Well ( i know i say this often but..)when you think you like somone again become there friend or if not that smile at them whem your eyes meet.Your obvously a sensitive guy and heaps of girls love that.Show them who are

 

 

I'm going to disagree with you, Liza. Heaps of girls love sensitive guys? Not really. You see, a sensitive guy tends to be the passive person in a relationship, and we all know that, in most cases, female = passive role/male = active role, while in a relationship.

 

I was a sensitive guy, and you know what, that did no good for me. Honestly, girls don't care about your feelings early on (maybe in an advanced phase of a relationship, perhaps), they only care about what you can provide them, i.e. fun, happyness, thrill, whatever.

 

A lot of girls used to told me 'Oh, you're so sweet and sensitive..." and I got some mythical lines too, like 'I wish my boyfriend was more like you.' But that was what they were saying, because all of them were hanging off the non-sensitive guys. Acts = true, words not always.

 

-----------------------

 

Anyways, back to the original poster.

 

Man, it's tough, and I know what you mean. You want that girl... The one who will make everything be OK. Well, you won't find her if you keep that way. You want a serious and romantic relationship, and that's fine. But how are you going to find a girl for that if you're too afraid to be with girls in a sexual way (and by sexual I mean romantic).

 

Go out with them, have fun. The point of that is to try them out, and see which one clicks with you. As a lot of people say, it's a numbers game.

[Soylent Green]

Wow, man, you seem pretty mature for only 14 and you clearly have a good sense about yourself and your emotions. You view yourself as a "little shy kid", but if girls are already asking you out, you're probably not giving yourself enough credit. But even if you are really "shy" and "little"....repeat after me...you're only 14! You could be six feet tall and brimming with confidence when you're 18, for all you know! Alot can happen between 14 and 18. In any case, don't feel rushed to be in a relationship or become a full-blown adult. Being an adult sucks a lot of the time. Enjoy being a kid for a little longer!