So Stressed Out and Angry

[Beaker5]

Hi Guys,

It's me. Ok, I'm back at school, all of my classes are soo wonderful and difficult because they're all upper level and I love them and they keep me very busy. I have pretty cool roommates that are very high spirited and usually happy. So in that area, everything is good.

 

There are a couple of problems however...One..my exboyfriend...two...my club.

 

Well, about my exboyfriend, I just found out that he's now the treasurer of one of the clubs that my suitemate is in and they will be having some meetings here sometimes so that stressed me out. I kind of had a small panic attack... but after I thought about it, I just told them to let me know on time when the meetings will be and I'll just leave to the library or something. I just don't want to break no contact and if he actually did come over, it would be sooooo selfish of him because its not fair to me because he gets to see the place I'm living in and it's just not fair.

 

The other problem is he used to be vice president of MY club and I guess that's why he's now treasurer of that other club. And its really not fair because its almost like he's rubbing it in my face that he's not going to be in MY club anymore. I'm just so angry right now and I'm literally crying because I just can't take this extra stress. I don't want it anymore. I don't want him in my life..but he somehow manages to slither back in. I just don't know what to do. I want him out...out of my life...for good. Oh...and his current roommate (who was my friend before he even met my ex) came here for that club meeting that my boyfriend is now in and I'm SURE he noticed everything in the apartment and went to gossip back to my EX. I just don't want a spy in my apartment. I don't want this stupid person in my life.

 

So very angry!!!

[Closure]

I'm sure if you sat your 'suitemate' (whatever the heck that is young lady!!) down and explained the situation they could schedule their meetings for somewhere else. Where you live is supposed to be your safe zone, where you can leave your things, feel safe, have a bloody good cry and not feel stressed. If she doesn't agree and proceeds then take it further if you can or as a last resort you can move.

 

Relax, breath, you can control this.

[Beaker5]

Hi Closure..Thank you so much for your advice but my suitemates are great and I know that the club is important for my suitemate so I wouldn't want to ask her to not have the meetings there anymore becuase they sometimes cannot find a place to have the meeting.

 

I guess I'll just try to be mature and whenever I know he is going to come over, I'll just study at the library or the lab. I just don't want to break no contact because I'll know he'll be fine, but I'll be the one that is devastated. Thanks again.

[Closure]

As a point of principle you shouldn't be going out of your way for this guy whatsoever.

 

Have you started dating again? Maybe find something positive to look forward to rather than looking back?

[Relax]

Maintain a strict no contact policy and stick with it. Don’t pass notes through friends. Don’t make any calls. Stay away from instant messaging or texting on your cell. Just don’t contact your ex until you are totally and completely sure you no longer want to be with him or her. It is the only way.