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From bad to worse


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Probally best if you guys read my original situation



So to elaborate, after we got back to together, she wasnt the same felt like she didnt really want to be with me. All beacuse she 'wants to find herself' and she cant do it without me, which of course after putting me through almost 3 months of utter hell, i dont get it.


Basically a few days ago, last thursday to be precise, she picks me up for 1st day back at college, tells me the same old * * * * about her wanting to find herself and be herself, bye bye boyfriend (although we had basically been argueing or rather me argueing with her about her not showing me any attention of really changing still me wanting a relationship and her not).


So i take it fairly well at first to be honest i was half expecting it. Back olmost immediately, she starts flirting with one of my friends, totally blanks me, shows almost to sign of our relationship affecting her, whilst she has dangled the prospect of us getting back together again infront of me.


she goes out as per usuall without me, with her other friends, almost on a double date what it apeared to be.


and today i finally snapped and told her i didnt want anything to do with her, and that if she wanted to be friends, why she still treating me lower than dirt.


I know you will all say what the * * * * you still doing, but i have tried and tried, i just cannot get over her. And its almost impossible as we are in the same class, have the same friends.


oh and to boot, aparently everything is my fault beacuse i just cant let go and im causing a bigger rift, but she sereously puts no effort in, to even salvadge my sanity.


any kind of help would be great, the whole ordeal is making my life a misery. ie feeling constantly sick

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hi im with u mate its amazing the capacity we have to absorb the crap others give us and treat us when we think the world of them . I bet you wouldnt treat here that way cos you care. what does that tell you .you couldnt turn it on and off like she does and it hurts. shes looking for someone to blame in her life and thats you. it has to be someone else other than her for here to justify the way she is and treats you. looks like she,l get the wake up call and "find" herself pretty soon at this rate. dont give her the stick to beat you with. stay safe

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thing is i dont whether i will be there for her if she ever does wake up so to speak. Perhaps its the fact she is my first true love, but i am starting to feel really bitter towards her. yet as hard as i try, i know that i cant just start dating someone else, if i wanted to i could probally have my pick of girls.

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