my ex was a big jerk but i still want him back

[cinderelly65]

broke up and yeah i still want the jerk back. why? because i miss what i had when things were good. and no one else seems to give me the comfort that i once had. it's uncomfortable and akward dating other people and so far i haven't clicked with anyone else. so i find it really hard to move on or trust another guy and so far the guys i have dated are worse than my ex. at least with my ex i had some kind of security which is better than having nothing at all which is what i'm getting from the guys i have been dating. i want to put my effort back into getting back with my ex and not into dating guys i know i can't trust.

[AdriSnow]

noooo Me too . Ive been delaying getting ride of my ex. My emotions are going crazy and the truth is when men are down they are done. EVen throught you think they love you. And even say it. He is probably with someone chick right NOW at least mine is just took some chick to islands of adventure. so Point is when it's done the Man is prolly done. Yet, we are still here in pain over it

[shes2smart]

Hi there...

 

I looked back at some of your earlier posts because your screen name looked familiar.

 

The ex you're wanting to get back with....is this the guy you wrote about a few months ago who was with another woman in front of you? If so, that is definitely NOT worth going back to.

 

From what I've seen of your posts, I'd suggest to you that many of the problems you're running into stem from the fact that you're looking for a guy/relationship to provide something that can only come from within you. Wanting someone to give you things like "security" is like building your home on a very unstable foundation....it's going to come tumbling down in time.

 

i want to put my effort back into getting back with my ex and not into dating guys i know i can't trust

 

You've got another option -- putting your effort into building up the relationship you have with yourself so that you can attract and select trustworthy partners in the future.

 

I have found that it is very true that we attract who we are...and that we can only attract/create a relationship that is as healthy (emotionally/mentally) as we are on our own. If you keep getting involved with guys you cannot trust and in relationships that are not healthy, perhaps you need to spend some time looking at where you're at as an individual and improving that first.

[Momene]

If you ex is also an ex-jerk then discuss getting back together but if he's still a jerk, don't bother. It's better to be alone.