More venting than anything else -- the dreaded friend zone

[StrcPrstSkrzKrk1903]

OK. There's this girl, call her K-. (That's always how it begins, isn't it?) We've known each other since late 2002, became better friends in late 2003, and although I was somewhat attracted to her from the start, it wasn't enough for me invest too much of myself and make a total doofus out of myself. Over the past few years, we managed to maintain contact and continued to hang out sometimes, although my going to school in Canada made it hard to see each other during the school year.

 

With all of the mental angst that I've gone through with other subjects, I find myself thinking often about the people I have the best personal connections with, and I really have to say that I have never in my life connected on so deep a level with a girl than I have with K-. Combine this with the attraction that I feel for her and it turns out that I really feel like I'm in love with her. I know I'm only twenty years old, but I have been around the block emotionally, I know what lust feels like and what love feels like.

 

So this evening, I get a message over Facebook from K-'s best friend (whom I've never met), saying "K- thinks u r a XY MO FO!!!!" [sic] I'm confused as to whether or not it's a joke -- I wouldn't have put it past either K- or her friend, from what K-'s told me of her -- but it seems logical that K- would've had to speak highly of me to her friend for that joke to occur in the first place. Turns out it is a joke, though her friend mentions that she wishes K- "would run off and marry [me] instead of the random jerks she usually dates."

 

Then, of course, comes the bad news. The high praise that K- speaks of me is "A sweet boy" and "Like a brother" -- in her friend's estimation, "not generally good signals for a BF."

 

Part of me -- OK, all of me -- really wants to believe that since K-'s friend thinks K- and I are such a good match, HAVING NEVER MET ME, that's got to say something about my chances. On the other hand, I can also understand why K- might have misgivings about being more than friends with me, because I don't want to take advantage of her. I'm not exactly sexually active -- I'm still a virgin, by a LONG SHOT -- and I've been much more active in cultivating emotional intimacy with her. Then again, the year I was getting to know her, I was so incredibly confused by questions of emotional intimacy that it's hardly surprising that that's all that came out of it.

 

Whew, that felt good. Now, thoughts, anyone?

[SkylinesTurnstiles]

Umm does she know how you feel?

[StrcPrstSkrzKrk1903]

I can't say she does, no.