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Where do you meet gay people?


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Gay women, more specifically.

 

I know this thread has been started a few times before, but i need to vent! Where are all the sane and available gay women? I mean, ones that don't want to go out clubbing every night, ones that aren't ashamed of who they are, ones who will stand up for what they believe in, and ones that have goals and ambitions that extend beyond just 'being gay'!

 

But really... where are you all?

 

Where do you meet decent gay or accepting women? And please do not say the College gay club, because i am beyond University and am not returning just to meet a lesbian. Lol.

 

Maybe i should just be happy with myself and the 'right' person will 'come along'... as they say.

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I mean, I am in Australia... any good Australian sites? I want to meet people for relationships, with potential for relationships and getting to know, with the purpose of having a relationship!

 

Am i being too stalkerish? I am so sick of my own company! Enough is enough.

 

People say, "take advantage of being single and do all the things you wouldn't be able to do if you were in a relationship". Well, i can tell you... i've done all of those things, a thousand times over.

 

Next!

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Well, i can tell you... i've done all of those things, a thousand times over.

 

Next!

 

LOL

 

Well...I met my girlfriend on link removed. There were tons of women who were winking at me on there. Some of them were pretty hot, too.

 

I totally know about trying to meet sane women, though. Most are the U-Haul lesbian type!

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I totally know about trying to meet sane women, though. Most are the U-Haul lesbian type!

 

It's not the u-haul lesbians i am trying to avoid, it's the twisted sisters!

 

That link removed site is good, but i am in Australia and i don't think Australian women subscribe to it. I had a look at the site and there was one honey there i would date in an instant... but alas, she's over the other side of the world. *Sigh*!

 

Oh well, back to the drawing board.

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Well for myself what helped was becoming familiar with the " * * * * * Sectors" of the Metro city areas which I travel to, those which have * * * * * based or friendly establishments, I particularly like the Cafes and Bookshops which cater to the Gay Community.

 

Though, I do feel you on the lack of decent lesbians out there. Lot of scary women before I found a gem which is now my girlfriend. I don't know, I've only met a few that were open minded, peaceful and down to earth.

 

Otherwise I've met a slew which were out protesting everything, arguing everything, looking for a mate to live with asap (Uhaul syndrome type), there were some that would go into an all out tizzy if you didn't look gay enough, some paranoid, and the list just goes on. I've met so many more "burnt out" lesbians than Heterosexual or Bisexual.

 

Actually, I've had more success (on a friends basis) with Bisexuals. Meet more Bisexual Women interested in Women that are located on planet earth and in touch with reality. At least from my experience and my own personal definition of Still here mentally, physically and emotionally.

 

Personally I don't know what it is with some of these lesbians, but there are normal ones out there, just a great deal harder to come by, for whatever reason unbeknownst (at least fully) to me as of yet.

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I've met so many more "burnt out" lesbians than Heterosexual or Bisexual.

 

Hmm, well maybe they're 'burnt out' from trying to fight for our rights, in the past, so that people like you and i can enjoy our sexuality (even now, it is a psuedo acceptance, but i won't go into that). If it wasn't for our sisters of the past, and some of those so-called 'u-haul lesbians', people like you and i would still be creeping around, hiding our sexuality.

 

The older generation of lesbians may look a bit jaded to you, and it's interesting that that's what you focus on, but to me, many of them are heros. They were the ones that put themselves out there, in opposition to popular culture, so that they, and ultimately we, could have a better life. Those u-haul lesbians, as you call them, weathered all sorts of abuse and pressure when gay rights were emerging.

 

When i first 'came out', there was no such thing as the internet... and gay rights were a speck on the social/cultural agenda. People got to know each other through networks. As it currently stands, depending on the area you are in, same sex couples are able to walk the down street, holding hands! Without being stared at and without being abused... Now, that's progress. In some geographical areas, it is so accepted, that it is almost the norm.

 

So, if the over-40-something lesbians look a bit 'weathered', i don't blame them. They've had a lot to fight for, and not much appreciation for it.

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Well, that was an assumption.

 

I don't believe that was targeted at those who are fighting for our rights, and was a leap on your half. Burnt out is a wider term than Political Activity. While yes there are some that I believe are odd on that half (and we're all entitled to our opinions on that) it wasn't an all encompassing term.

 

As it currently stands, depending on the area you are in, same sex couples are able to walk the down street, holding hands! Without being stared at and without being abused

 

This does not exist for us where I'm located outside of the * * * * * Areas. Even IN the * * * * * areas we still get strangers who have no problem slinging their hatred. So I don't know this joy in the so called mainstream acceptance. For me, it doesn't exist. Maybe in 10 years or so, but for right now I am stuck where you can be open on a selective basis. The US is not as progressive as we'd like to view it far as I'm concerned from personal experience.

 

and some of those so-called 'u-haul lesbians', people like you and i would still be creeping around, hiding our sexuality.

Anyhow, how do U-Haul lesbians, at least the definition I've learned, constitute any progress for our rights? For most people I've met it makes a greater joke of us. Women desperate to move right in and settle down, the ones that have barely given any time for individual development of a relationship. Not many lesbians I've met are fond of U-Hauls and try to avoid them as possible as they hinder, not help. Leech mentality, not an individualistic independent one which we ARE in need of.

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Well, what do you mean by "worn out"? I don't understand.

 

I guess not all lesbians or otherwise that fought for our rights in the past were of the U-haul type, or any other type for that matter. It's just that the U-haul type you are referring to are more likely to have been those that did because (assumption) they have been around for the longest. You don't meet many lesbians your or my age (even though i am 10 years older than you) who are U-haul do you?

 

Speaking of U-hauls, i never really understood the definition for them, but thank-you for enlightening me. I guess they can come in any shape or form, but it is the 'butch' looking girls that get mistaken for them often?

 

I met a butch woman years ago. I used to see her around for a while and was scared of her, but when i met her, i realised she was a kitten and not a U-haul at all. In fact, getting her to commit was the hardest thing for a friend of mine that dated her. She is a free spirit and is still one now. It's funny how we make assumptions before truelly getting to know people.

 

While the 'butch' look isn't for me, i wouldn't rule it out if the person was intelligent, sweet and fun. And employed!

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If it is so good nowadays, why do we still fight, I wonder. I'm not only talking about lesbians as they were not hte only one's fighting got gay rights. In many parts of the world it's still almost impossible and even punishable to be gay. The progress we are talking about is far from worldwide. They are very local. Although a lot have been done there are still a lot that can be done. Maybe not for gay and lesbisns but we have the trans part too which have practically no voice in the gay community and a lot of people doesn't know what they mean when they say trans. that's a pretty big group with trandgender, transsexual, intergender, intersexual, transvestite... now did I forget anyone? all of these words with their meaning.

 

Although a lot of these women you are fighting about might be considered heros they are also a part of those who discriminate bisexuals and transgendere people just like straight people discriminated us. It's often the old one's, the heros, that can't accept change. Young people tend to be more accepting. I'm not saying that these are bad persons and that ou shouldn't be grateful, hell i'm grateful, but we still have to go on. We can't only make it well for us, but for everyone. all minorities who goes under GLBTQ.

 

ok, it's late and i'm whining a lot. good night

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I agree with you in that gay people aren't really accepted... it's a sort of pseudo acceptance and i am well aware of that. But, things have come some distance. I think.

 

In relation to the young/old debate, everybody has something to offer, regardless of age. There are many older people who have wisdom to offer. Then again, some don't and some aren't wise. There are also many younger people who are obnoxious and conceited. Then again, there are some (or many) that are full of energy, innocence and are very giving.

 

One thing for sure is that we're all gonna get there one day... old age. Hahaha!

 

I still don't know what Jinx meant by 'tired lesbians'...

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