Why do bad things happen in twos, threes and more?!!

[kittenmoomoo]

Hi there, feeling a bit weird atm. 10 minutes ago I wanted to cry, but now that I'm on eNotalone again (have been avoiding it, dunno why?), I feel okayish.

 

Yeah, so as my title says, why do bad things come in pairs and more?

 

If you read my past threads, you'll know I am recovering from a 3 year long relationship that ended due to the S.O. being unfaithful. It's been nearly a month and most of the time I'm okay, but then sometimes I like to be cruel to myself and think about him. My brain has become like a slideshow of his face.

 

Just before I found out about him being unfaithful, I also lost 2 of what I thought were my best friends. It hasn't affected me too much, I think maybe I'm going through a cleanse of my life. I just feel both of them didn't give me the support I was looking for with my situation, they were both pretty selfish and cold to me when they knew I was on the floor crying. Is it wrong to give them the flick because of that?

 

Okay, so I'm trying to get on with things, stop thinking about him, going out, having fun and drinking (a bit too much, but what can you do). Last night I was out at a club, drunk as per my last few weekends and I find out my bag is stolen from the cloak room!! My new phone is in that bag, my keys - to my house, car and work!, my ID, my bank card. Grrr, why does life only get worse when you think it can't?

 

Is there someone watching over me and playing these horrible pranks just for a laugh or are they testing me how much I can take before I crack? I know there is far worse things that people are going through in life, but I just don't understand why so many bad things are happening to me in such a short period of time? I believe I'm a good person. But I guess good people finish last.

[NJRon]

In one week my wife decided to leave me, my dog ate a tulip bulb and resulted in a $900 vet bill and my car was stolen (I had just paid it off and cancelled full coverage 2 weeks prior because I couldn't afford it anymore).

 

Things happen when they happen. Sometimes they happen at the same time, other times they are spread accross a long time. It has nothing to do with how good (or bad) of a person you are.

 

I was, and am, a good person, even though bad things happened to me. It doesn't mean I was singled out at a particular time.

 

One thing I can think of that distinguishes a good versus bad person is not what happens to the person, but how they react to what happens to them.

 

Good people don't finish last. There is no finish line by which 'goodness' is judged... goodness is a state of being. As long as you keep that in your heart, especially during times of adversity, you will always be 'ahead' of anyone who doesn't.

 

Hang in there...

[kittenmoomoo]

Thanks NJRon. I think I'm just feeling a bit negative atm. Sorry about your situation, it must have been your worst week ever. I hope the sunshine comes after the rain....

[NJRon]

Hehe.. no.. it wasn't my worst week ever... and I'm sure I will have worse ones down the line. What matters is that, once you are able to get through something, you learn that you have the strength to get through other things.

 

The sunshine will come again for sure and, when the next raincloud hits, you'll know, within yourself, you will be alright. You'll have a wellspring of strength from which to draw.

 

You are a good person... good things will come to you when you are ready for them.

[kittenmoomoo]

Woah, not your worst week ever? I like your attitude. I guess what doesn't kill us, only makes us stronger!

[rose2summer]

kitten,

 

Tough times come in pairs,

 

This year has been a terrible one for me (major health problems with family/friends, breakup, the list goes on),

 

But I have finally started seeing the beautiful sunlight,

 

And I am going to it full force,

 

I know you are upset about losing your SO and friends,

 

But the future will bring better things,

 

Be patient and the lemons will stop falling from your tree,

 

And be replaced with happiness and good things,

 

Hugs to you!

 

Rose

[ElektraHere]

Sometimes I feel they happen to get our attentions to something else. In one month I lost my grandmother, my b/f broke up with me, then I was fired from my job. It sucks and you know it made me realize somethings about myself. Oh i still have miles and miles to go in resolving some of these issues. However, had these events not happened I would not be on the road in the first place.

[RelaxByWater84]

I don't know why problems come in twos or threes for other people. For me its when my friend has problems usually within three months of her problems I will get problems. Such as when my friend got into a car accident(she has been in three) two or three months later I got into one(I've been in 2). And my friend got into her third one this summer so I'm a little nervous. Hope your problems get better.

[chigal28]

I'm sorry to hear that all of those things happened to you at once!! It really can start to feel overwhelming and like "what did I do wrong?" But, I really do feel like everything that happens in life, happens for a reason....and I think quite often that reason is to give us a firsthand knowledge of our own strength, and what we can get through. That's very powerful stuff.

 

When I was a junior in college, within one week my bf of a year and a half and I broke up (quite bitterly, too), my grandma, whom I was VERY close to, passed away, I lost my temp job AND I got asked to leave the a cappella singing group to which I planned to devote all my time to forget about all the other stuff!!! It was an extremely difficult time. But because I lost the temp job and the a cappella group asked me to leave, I took a job at the college newspaper, and I've now been in the journalism biz and LOVING it for 5 years...I'm with an awesome guy...and I really feel like my grandma is watching over me.

 

I guess my point is that looking back I can see the reason for all of that happening, and I wouldn't be who I am today without it. I also know that when tough stuff happens now, even many bad things seeming to happen at once, I can look back on my junior year of college and say--I got through it once, when I had NO idea what kind of strength I had--and I can get through it again, easier because now I KNOW.

 

You are strong, too, and all of this will show you that. Hang in there!!! After lots of bad things happen to me, and I get through it, I find that lots of good things happen...eventually...

[renaissancewoman101]

"when one door closes another one opens"

 

Sometimes it is good to keep that in mind. It helps us stay optimistic.

 

I do agree bad luck happens in threes. I have seen that happen with me a few times. But then sometimes, I feel as though my life is always on the low side of things.

[kittenmoomoo]

Thanks heaps everyone! It makes me feel a little better knowing I'm not the only one who has bad stuff happen in pairs and more. It is very true that things happen for a reason, I hope I see the reasons soon. You have all gone through a lot worse than me in a short period of time and I congratulate you for surviving it! Thanks again for all your wisdom.