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Conversational rapport - good sign?


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I hung out with someone I liked for one day last year and then never met up with her again until now (due to conflicting schedules, time, etc.). I'd thankfully managed to grab her email during that one time and - in an effort to not lose touch - have been sending her drawings I've done occasionally, along with wishing to catch up. After months of nothing concrete, she finally found the time to catch a movie with me.

 

So we finally met again for the first time since last year, watched a movie (on me), had a casual dinner (on her) and then commuted home. I'd wondered whether my attraction for her would have dwindled during the big absense, however when I saw her, I realised she'd stayed on my mind for a reason.

 

The significant thing here is that I can really be myself around her, and I can talk the way I talk and not have to act up or put on a facade to cover any awkwardness I may have. I wondered before meeting her again, whether I'd stumble and shows submissiveness, but despite not having seen her for months (and only ever hanging out with her one other time) I felt really comfortable around her right away.

 

I have a few female friends, but I can honestly say that I've never really had any long conversations as my earnest self, that I've had with this one. With her, it's mellow, casual, and we can discuss and laugh about things the way I like. I have silly observations about life, and I can tell her about them without any hesitation. There were few gaps of silence.

 

She's stayed in my head even though being absent in person for nearly a year, and after just 2 meetings, I realised that I can just talk comfortably to her for ages. And she's the only girl ever, who I can do this with. While she hasn't shown any obvious attraction to me, she's definitely just as comfortable talking to me and hasn't been repulsed by my emails.

 

Are these good signs or nothing special?

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I don't think it really matters what you call it.

 

As for how the "date" went - it's hard to tell. It seems she at least likes you as a friend, but I don't think there are any obvious signs in your post that she likes you romantically. Not saying she doesn't, just that you didn't post anything obvious. It is a little odd though, that it took her 1 year before she found time to see a movie with you. Even the busiest people find time here and there to see someone they really like.

 

If you had a nice time, ask to see her again. And if she keeps rebuffing, take it as a sign of distinterest and move on.

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  • 2 months later...

She sent me an email recently signalling the end to her degree. This is the first time she's sent me an email via her own initiation. All others have been replies to mine. So it was a pleasant surprise. I've bugged her all year with periodic emails (to ensure I'm not forgotten), and despite fears she may get annoyed by them, it seems that she's not repelled at all.

 

I recently caught her on an IM and she asked me when I'd be free twice (amongst other chatter), and after telling her, she mentioned when we'd be able to catch another movie. I also inquired about something else of hers that I didn't understand and said I was still waiting for her to teach me about it. Because the last time I said this, she said I could ask my parents. This time she happily said she would once I was free.

 

I find all these signs positive and hope they develop.

 

Again, I realise it doesn't seem all that different from a relationship with a best friend. But I should also clarify that the type of people we are, aren't as "socially busy" as some may assume. So while it was quite a while before we got together for the second time, I do believe it's in our generally low-key lifestyle rather than lack of enthusiasm. I think she's more timid than normal, so any feelings on her behalf wouldn't manifest so clearly either.

 

I've speculated on whether she had a boyfriend already, and even with our limited contact, I think it's unlikely. I know she's been insanely busy, the one phone call I witnessed her receiving was from her brother, and a long absense on the IM was because she had gone to her parents'. It's still possible, but as of yet, there hasn't been any indicative clues.

 

And it does look like we're beginning a trend of spending time exclusively (of which she's contributing to), since there haven't been any thoughts of inviting others. 'Cause she could just as easily bring her friend(s) whom she's been studying with for the past year.

 

I'm not saying that we're definitely walking toward the same path, but I also don't believe in dismissing this so casually. I mean, she could just be on a high after completing a hectic year, but then she also bothered to inform me about it, when she could've just started enjoying her free time.

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