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Im jealous, but i dont like her


rusty_boi

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Hey all

 

Well here are the events leading up to my problem. 2 of my friends got girlfriends around the same time. So it was only me who was left single. In an effort to help us all have girlfriends they tried to set me up with one of their girlfriends friends. I was always 50-50 on her. Anyway after about 4 weeks of pushing it we kissed and got a tad intimate (not sex) she made the move by the way. It was after that i realised i didnt like her (Because i knew i wud be a bad bf e.g. if she wanted 2 go out just me and her i wud make an excuse not to go. I told her i cant go out with her).

 

Anyway moving on about 2 weeks after this, a huge group of us go out. Apart from saying hello she ignored me all night. Like it was obvious because my friends were all in a car parked and i walked over to speak to them and she shut the window in my face, so i walked away. Then i was dropping people home and i had to take her neighbour home so i offered her a lift and she didnt say anything her friend told me dont worry bout it (I thought it was stupid to send 2 cars to da same place). i was really offended because it was as if i did sumthn wrong but i hadnt.

 

ok so move to last saturday. i told her i hate her when i was drunk (i never wished she was dead but it was a way i vocied my anger. i apologised yesterday), I felt no remorse for wat i said at the time. I saw her hooking up with another guy later on that night, she din see me so i dont think it was meant to make me jealous. But i felt really jealous, i dont have any feelings for her but i dont wanna see her with someone else. I know its selfish, and i cant piece it together. My mate wants me 2 set them up but i dont wanna because for sum reason it hurts to see her with someone else. Ive been considering asking her out but i dont wanna because i know i will hurt her. I think if i go out with someone else ill still be jealous. Im not normally a jealous person, so its all new to me

 

Anyway 2 things i wanna ask 1) why am i jealous if i dont like her

2) how can i make it stop

 

thanks heaps everyone

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I think it can be normal to feel a bit jealous at times. As you said, your best friends have girlfriends, so you feel like you should have one also. It seems like you have a good grip on the situation though. It doesn't seem like you like this girl very much, and if you met a girl you were crazy about tomorrow, you wouldn't even give this other girl a second thought.

 

I don't think you need to "set up" this girl with her new make-out buddy. He can ask her out himself, or she can ask him out, but I think it would be awkward and weird if you started playing matchmaker for her.

 

I think... just look at things objectively. Yes, you are a bit jealous, that's because you had a brief fling with her. And also probably because your friends have girlfriends and you don't. But I think you know the right thing to do is to just leave her alone because you know you don't really want her.

 

You'll be fine. The feelings will pass.

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