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to return...or not to return?


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So what are you all's positions on returning items that an ex left at your house/gave to you after a break up? Basically I just mutilated some things my ex left at my house in a fit of rage hahaha. But it doesn't matter right? Because I shouldn't have to return them anyway...?

 

...I'm starting to feel a little guilty, even though the guy is a complete * * * *.

 

What do you all think? Ever done this before? I just needed to share that with someone. *sigh*

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I agree that if it were something that was their actual personal property , that it should be promptly and properly returned.

 

BUT,,,,,,, if it were something given to YOU by that person , then I also agree that it would be yours to do as you see fit.

 

I actually destroyed several items that were given to me as gifts or purchased by my EX BF for me, when we broke up. It was sort of a therapeutic sacrifice of those items to signify my parting with him.

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I just ended an abusive relationship. Everything in my house that still belonged to him, I wrapped up carefully and mailed to him. The gifts... well, some of it I destroyed (ripped up the love letters and burned some wedding pictures). Other things I took to the salvation army, no reason why someone else couldn't enjoy them. Sports shirts and jerseys he'd given me (have to say, it was a bit weird seeing a kid 3 weeks later wear what had to be my old jersey), a jewellry box, etc. I also took all the self-help books to a used bookstore (made a small fortune, guess that was a sign

 

Him though? I fully expect him to have smashed, destroyed and thrown out about $3000-4000 dollars worth of my sculptures, books and paintings. And if he makes the divorce difficult, I'm taking that out of his hide.

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I think you should definitely try to return the stuff, by either arranging for the ex to pick it up from your porch, mailing it to him if possible, dropping it off (if things aren't to hostile).

 

Years ago, I dated this guy for maybe several weeks. He turned out to be a big jerk to me and he put the 'L' in Loser. So when I dumped him I told him he could come get his stuff. He didn't. I lived in a house that was literally about 500 sq feet. I told him again to get his stuff. He arranged a time to pick it up, but he didn't show. I finally told him to get his stuff NLT a certain date, or else I was getting rid of it. He still didn't show. So my Dobie/Shepherd mix got some new chew toys.

 

He had the nerve to show up maybe two weeks later at 3 AM!! completely out of the blue, with no phone call or anything, with a guy friend of his, banging on my door (Kicking it even), hurling expletives, demanding I give him his stuff. I didn't bother to answer, I simply called the police, and I really couldn't care less what became of 'Loser' after that.

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