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Why does he keep doing this??


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I have had no contact with my ex for 6 weeks. He had been really upset with me about our break up. I occasionally see him (3 times during the 6 weeks) but I make no effort to speak to him or pay him any attention. Everytime he has made sure that I saw him. The 1st 2 times were at a local store. He saw me stop to talk to someone both times and then he would walk by slowly and he would stare at me after he walked past me. The 1st time he walked by at a distance and the 2nd time he walked within 3 feet of me.The 2nd time he was watching me as he continued up the escalator. The 1st time I did look at him but that was it. I did not say a word. The 2nd time I didn't look at him until he was almost all the way up the escalator and he was still looking at me. Then the very next day after that I was driving home from work and he passed me. He got caught at a red light and I was making a right hand turn so I passed him to turn. As I did he leaned way over into the passenger side of his car (he was alone) and looked right at me. I looked past him and turned when it was clear. I did not let on that I saw him but I am sure he knew I did. It would have been hard not to have seen him because he seemed to want to make sure that I did see him. I told a couple of friends about this and they said he was definetly trying to get my attention and that maybe he was missing me. I tried to send him a text message today to see if he wanted to talk and he texted me back and said he didn't want to talk to me. I texted him again and asked him to stop trying to get my attention everytime he sees me then. Why is he trying to get my attention if he doesn't want to talk to me? I am confused.

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The fact that he is so pointed and making it very obvious that he is staring at you can also be taken as intimidation. When someone really stares at someone, being blatantly unashamed and obvious about it, that is not about missing someone, it is about intimidation. He did that, you contacted him to get together and he said no. This is all about control and nothing more. Stay away from him until he grows up.

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I see what you are saying however I never got the impression he was trying to intimidate me. He's not a controlling person to begin with. In his car he pretended like he was reaching for something but I knew what he was really doing. In the store he did try to be discreet but I knew he was looking at me. Seems like strange behavior for someone that was so upset and asked me to not contact him that he would watch me like he does. I did say in my original post that he stared but he really wasn't staring but he was watching me. I don't know what his goal was but I don't feel that he was trying to intimidate me.

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