Updates on my story... Any suggestions?

[Loosing it]

Just wanted to keep you guys updated on my story, and also, once again ask for help.

I left you out at the part where she left me. She packed her things (took half of them as the elevator was broken) and left to her parents house. We said goodbye to each other, hugged. And I haven't seen her since.

Once she arrived she texted one of our friend – "Oh my god. What did I do? I did a mistake. I can't stop thinking about Nikita" Something like that.

Well she is trying to contact me everyday, as she promised at the beginning, and even though I said that only message/phone call I want to get from her is the one when she is sure that she want to be back together, she is still texting me with just some everyday stuff. She is asking me of how my day was. Saying good night.

I made some things really clear after she left. She didn't like the place we lived, the town we lived at. She always wanted to move, but my job, and my simple ignorance, never let me understand it completely. I never took it seriously… That is my fault. She moved to her parents' house about 100 miles away, got a new job. I think she likes it there as she grew up there... It is a quite place…

Well anyways.

The day we separated she texted me "Good night…." On a phone…

I have been thinking about my mistakes all the time, and came to realize that it was mostly my fault. I can't say 100%, but 80-90 – that's for sure. So the next day I wrote an email to her parents. I didn't want them to feel that I'm blaming them for break up... They are amazing people. The email was: "I'm not sure if I should be writing this to you guys. But you are my

parents in law, so I feel like I shouldn't be ignoring you, no matter

what.

Kat and I are in a very difficult stage of a relationship now. I know

it is hard for both of us. It is hard for you too, because she is your

daughter, and I understand that you only wish the best for her. So do

I...

I really want to apologize for everything I've done wrong in those 3

years. I know we had wonderful times together, and we loved each other

very much. But I realize that I have been more then unfair to Kat. For

that I want to apologize to her, and to you, as her parents. She did

live her life for me and I took it as granted. This is all my fault,

and if our marriage is ever to be fixed - I will do anything it takes

not to let it happen.

I worry about Kat and you very much. I wish you guys only the best.

Thank you so much for everything." On which I got a very sweet reply, which pretty much said that they are heartbroken too. They do not want me to blame myself much, as there were no real mistakes... There were complexities. And they are supportive of both of us "reconciling the difficulties and

conquering the complexities to bring you to a new level in your relationship ".

Later this day, I got a text from her saying "Hey. I just wanted to know how is your day going. Thank you so much for the letter. It means so much for me that you would do that".

I replied as "It is absolutely fine. My day is nothing but usual". I wished her luck at her new job and a great night later in the evening.

I did some research at work and found out that I should be able to relocate to another office which is right where my wife is. And should have no problems of doing it... She texted me after work asking how my day was again. I replied something like "Found out some interesting news… but other then that – normal". She was desperate to know what are news, and I texted her back something like "Something you would be interested in a week ago". We played this game for a bit and then I told her the news and said that I know she wouldn't be interested. She replied saying: "Of course I might be interested, but there is a lot to discuss before we get there". After that she wrote that she thinks that we should talk either on a phone or in person, and that she will be over this weekend to pick up some more of her stuff and we can definitely talk then. Well so be it…

Anyways, yesterday she sent me another text just asking how my day was. I decided not to answer right away… I waited for 10 minutes and got the message: "Well, I'm going to bed. Long day. Hope yours was ok. Been thinking about ya…"

I replied saying that my day was alright and I'm curios to know what she has been thinking about me. I got that back: "I think about how are you doing and about everything else. I like working and helping my parents as it keeps me occupied. But I miss you. Get to bed".

Well we left it out like that…

So here I am. She is going to be here on Saturday or Sunday to talk, and now I'm scared. It looks like everything is going better then it could've, however there is no guarantee. Nobody can be sure.

I'm working on her website, as she is a painter, and always dreamed of her own website with portfolio and stuff. I'm going to finish it by the end of the week and send her flowers on Friday with nothing in the card except for her own URL .

Does anyone have any thoughts? There are several questions I have myself, but any feedback about the situation will be great.

How should I behave when she gets back? Do I run and hug her and all that stuff, or I just stay calm, like we are friends. What do I tell her? I mean I know I have to apologize for EVERYTHING I've done. I have to tell her everything I'm going to do (like me being ready to move. Me absolutely realizing what I did wrong. Me being ready to live for her now…)

Does any one have any suggestions?

And please keep in mind. I wasn't dumped. She asked for a break, and I suppose only because I was unfair to her... Took her love for granted.

Thank you so much everyone for support.

N

[Relationship Coach]

sorry it has taken so long for someone to respond. How did things turn out that weekend?

 

RC