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From living together to living apart

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My girlfriend and I have been together for 3 years. We are both 30. We moved to a new city together about 16 months ago. Our relationship has suffered asince,. She says she feels "trapped" and needs space. She has stopped wanting to have sex. We've both been struggling with this for months. She thinks the fact that we are in a small apartment in a new city where we have only each other is making her feel this way. After realizing we were not making things any better, she suggested we get sperate apartments and I suggested we get couples counseling. We're currently doing both. Things seem a little better, but we haven;t officially moved yet and have had only one counseling session. We bnoth made deposits on new aprtments and found someone to take over our lease.


I am feeling incredibly depressed over this. Can any women offer some insight? I love this girl more than anything, and she canl;t seem to explain to me why she's feeling the way she's feeling.

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Did you live together before you moved? If not, it may be well, she is finding out this may not be what she wants (this relationship), or maybe it is so many changes (new city, new living arrangements) that are just all too much.


Unfortunately, I cannot read her mind either, and I do hope counselling helps bring it out..it sounds like she WANTS to get those feelings figured out. But of course, there are no guarantees either.

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I have similar problems with my BF at times. We lived together for a year and a half. Then we broke up in March and have been living apart ever since. We got back together about two weeks after the break up and have not moved back in together since. It is at times rather uplifting to have the time and space to miss each other, but at other times (for me at least) I miss having someone to go to bed with every night and miss the daily contact you get when you are living with someone...


Perhaps this will be a good thing for your relationship and you may find you become closer because of the limited contact...

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