The Jerk

[brickchamp]

Hey guys....just wanted to give all of my awesome ENA friends an update on my second meeting with my ex after the break up at a weekend work function. He's still pretty much avoiding me....no talking, some sly glances...but here's the kicker...last night in the hallway of our hotel, he was texting a girl blatantly...right in front of me...like so I would see! Then he started yelling out to his buddies about how he was drunk the night before, and called a "ton" of people, including one of his ex girlfriends...keep in mind, I had been in a relationship with his friend before...and his friend caught wind of it and this guy dumped me like BOOM! in a text, and told his friend he wouldn't talk to me ever again. I thought if he was around me, he'd crack, but I think he's scared of his friend...who is also on this trip. Very screwed up indeed. But the way he was so callous, obviously communicating with his new GF, and "bragging" about all the girls he'd called...the nerve to do this is front of me...Poor girl he's with now! So I think at this point, there's no way he could get me back even he wanted to. He disgusts me. He's just so cruel and stupid. But I'm almost glad this happened. It was going to take something like this to make me get over him. I'm not totally there, I'll admit, but I'm a heck of a lot closer today!!! What a JERK! Anyway, thanks for listening, and for always helping me trhough my various crises.

[need2bme]

I really hope this helps. It sounds like he is a real blowhard. It is a shame, because regardless of him dating you, how about treating anyone that way, much less you.

 

Well, sweetie, it looks as if he has shown his true colors. I have to tell ya that for a while, I was hoping I would find out that the GF had cheated on me, because it would make it easier.

 

Now, I know it would crush me. Maybe you ought to act as if you are texting someone, or better yet, if he does it again; text him in the middle of it and let hime know he is an a@@h***.

[nottoogreen]

No games, just disconnect from your ex. Avoid to see and hear what he does. Blank him out.

[joyce1412]

brickchamp, how do you know he is texting a new girl?

 

hopefully you will soon be in a position where you don't care. what a jerk.

[brando]

Just think Brickchamp, he did all of that nt so much to hurt you, but to make him self look like he had it going on. And it doesn't sound like he does.

 

Hang in there, it will get better. Im glad to see you handled this as an adult.

[friscodj]

This post is good, really good. You know why? Because it is angry, many experts agree that anger is a normal part of grief, and grieving gets you where you need to be...

 

So you're getting closer and closer to the promised land of indifference with all of this. Keep it up...

 

And really no matter what you do, short of having his baby or knocking him or this other chick off, you'll ultimately be fine...

[brickchamp]

Thanks for having my back buddies! I'm back home...I survived. I'm feeling fairly good too. Need2be, you said I should have texted him and called him an a** haha maybe that would have been better than what I actually did. I DID text him right after all his hollering about his girls. I know, don't yell at me people!! I was just in a rage. It couldn't be helped! Anyway, I said something about him calling his old GF, and I said that WE used to be friends, and didn't he miss talking to me AT ALL? No response as usual. He promised his friend he would never contact me in any way again...but I think my text made him feel bad...maybe. The next two days, I did something I'd not been able to do before EVER. I COMPLETELY ignored him. He's used to me watching him, looking at him, etc. like I have for years. This weekend, wherever he was, I looked the opposite way. But, ahem, I DO have exceptional peripheral vision. ha By yesterday, he was staring at me for LONG periods of time, like he was waiting for me to look over, which I never did! But as soon as his friend was around, he'd leave. He seemed quite agitated! GOOD! I know, I shouldn't even care if he was looking, or how he felt, if anything, but I don't care nearly as much, so that's good! Things are looking up I'm skipping the work thing this weekend...but then I'll have to go again in a couple of weeks...And I don't have the fear of being miserable all weekend anymore. He's losing his power over me finally! And it feels great.

[HangingInThere]

ok ok you slip...that text you sent him was a big no no...i mean, asking him if he misses you

 

i have to say Brick, he didn't really lose his power over you, his asinine behavior drew you in and you sent him a text!

 

You should go to the next weekend job and be that strong superwoman, even if you are pretending eventually you will feel it!

 

I am happy, was happy from the day i told him i need space/break - I am so thru with him. Last week i went to his myspace page and he still had he was In A Relationship (i go/went to his site out of curiosity, nothing more nothing less - i said this in another topic). Some weekends ago I went to Miami for the weekend being that i had to be in FL for biz trip that monday. I told him about it during our sabbatical. He went away this weekend and his buddy told me in conversation, I said oh that's nice he needed it, i hope he had a blast. Needless to say, i know that went back to him ( iguess he wanted me to be depress or sad that he is leisurely travelling) i was the total opposite, actually i didn't have any real feelings about it!

 

out of curiosity again, I went to his page and he is now Single....funny thing, i laughed when i seen it and said to myself, about time he changed his status!

 

but you see what i mean, when you act nonchalant or liek they dont exist, it gets the best of them - they don't how to act, especially when they are the ones who like to call the shots and are so egodriven...Egodriven was definitely the case for my ex (he was so disturbed when i initiated the space/break thing - it was like a piece of his manhood was rip from him.....I LOVED IT)

 

but Brick, please stop giving into him - next time you see him, as i said before, look splendid, be happy, be cheerful and full of convo for everyone...even give him one of those pleasant hello's (just hello nothing more but a smile on your face) and keep it moving! trust me that would definitely eat him up(if you dont believe me, just imagine if someone did that to you)

[brickchamp]

Well, yeah, at that point, he obviously got to me. I instantly regretted the text. I had taken some sleeping pills too, which seems to take away my inhibitions....so that was bad. It was like I had no control over what I was doing! But he made me so mad. By the time the shock, and the pills, wore off, the next day, I felt strangely calm. That was the first time ever I felt like he had gone out of his way to hurt me...and it made me see him for REAL...and I did not like what I saw. So he really is losing his power over me. I know that if he ever tried to get me back, he couldn't...I'm not just saying that, I feel that way inside. I would never trust him with my heart again - ever. And don't worry, after this, there will be NO more texting slip ups....pills or no pills. Thanks......