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Is this just a phase for her???


travsjeep
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Ok. she is in Hawii and has not seen me for 4 months now. She does not see me face to face everyday like she use too and does not see the man Iam now. She has tons of guys wanting her. She does not know what to do in life right now. And she is 18. Gone away for the first time. Before when we broke up and I tryed to move on it was hard but she got me back all the time becasue she could see me and cry in front of me and beg me back. She let me go after I begged her back over the phone and she has told me that she doesnt know and I know she still loves me but is blinded by the fact that I love her and need her and dont want everything else. I was like her when I was 18 and was consumed by love of other girls and it took me time till I was 21 to find out the only girl I should have been with was her. Is this just a stage or am I dont with. Could it be the girls she is around and the invironment. Or is it just I have no one and she has everything in life while I sit here. It is killing me knowing I dated a girl for 4 years and have done everything with her for the first time and now some guy is getting to be around her and she is forgetting me. IT SUCKS.

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One of the few benefits that comes with being older is the ability to look back at our feelings at a certain age, and be able to understand that what we feel at the moment won't ALWAYS be the way we feel. At your age and your erstwhile girlfriends, you don't have that luxury. I'm getting from your comments that she's in Hawaii while you're anywhere else, like the mainland U.S. The end of a long-term relationship is very painful no matter what the age.

 

Is it a phase? Yes. Do we all go through it? Yes. If you're a caring person with a real conscious, it will hurt every time something like this happens. It comes with the territory of being human. You have two choices: move back to hawaii and pursue her with all your heart, provided that you're doing it for the right reasons, rather than just to deny her to others. The other choice is to let go, and move forward. It hurts when we're alone, especially when the other one doesn't SEEM to be hurting like we are. It all balances out in the end though.

 

Move forward, remember the good times, and try to look upon her in a good light, but keep moving forward.

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She left to hawii on missions and the guy she was friends with is still writing her every day and sending her pictures. I learned all this when she asked me to start calling her. It was good conversations than I asked her to comitt to one of us becasue I was sick of hering about this Brain kid and she decide to try him becasue he was on missions too. 4 days later she called saying Im sorry lets be friend and Im friends with Brian too. Than I was happy Im getting some were it was great. She than was coming to me with personal question of what she should do with this and this and it was like old times. But every time we talked she would change her mind like God says we shouldnt be together. Than Im not goign to talk to you when I get back, than it none of your business if I talk to him and dont call anymore after we have had good terms for the last month. This is syco. All I asked her to go on a couple of dates when you get back and she said no after saying the brian thing she said she apoligized to him for talking to me. so IM LIKE AHAHAHAHAHAHAH she is messed up ILOVE HER TO DEATH but she has to figur out everything in lIfe and try not to think to much. This sucks.

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Sounds as though it's time to move on. You are right - she needs to figure out what she wants, and until then I'd suggest you not let her wrap you around her finger. I don't think there will be a situation where you could 'talk yourself' back into her life the way you'd like to be. She's already found out that it's a great big world out there, and there are guys everywhere. You need to do the same.

 

Good Luck.

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