His friends?

[sparx]

Hi all

 

Im dating a guy who is great, seems to have alot of characterstics im looking for. But, his friends appear to be a little not what i like, and not the type of crowd i associate with. Im concerend this will be an issue if our relationship progresses. He is good, its just his friends im not crazy about. any tips?

[orgasmictofu]

Honestly, who are you dating, him or his friends? Yes, you will hang out with his friends on occasion, grin and bear it. And heck, you might even find yourself having a good time with them. You haven't even given them a chance.

 

Don't let it be an issue. Go for it.

[sparx]

I don't mean to sounds snobby or like i am better than his friends, only that they are into things im not into and their lifestyle is totally different, they like to do things like drink a lot and smoke and those are things im not into. but i guess its ok since i am dating him not his friends?

[orgasmictofu]

but i guess its ok since i am dating him not his friends?

 

PRECISELY!

 

My boyfriend smokes. So does every single one of his friends. I don't. It's even harder for me to assimilate into the group because they all somehow know eachother from teenhood and I'm from the other side of the country. But when I hang out with them, I just pass on the smokes and try to have a good time anyway. If they're talking about high school days, I just listen and laugh at the good times they all had. When they talk about more general things, I add in my two cents. They aren't people I would NORMALLY hang out with since they are all very social and I'm more shy, but I have a blast when I'm around them.

 

They could totally surprise you.

[LostInMyThoughts]

Im concerend this will be an issue if our relationship progresses.

 

It's only an issue if you make it an issue.

 

Try to reverse the roles. What if you had some really close friends that you absolutely loved, and he really didn't like them. And he made an issue of it to the point where you felt like you had to chose between him, and your friends. Doesn't seem like a good situation to be in.

 

You don't have to force yourself to like his friends, but I'd give them a shot, and try to get to know them better.

[MrDraw]

You could "reverse" the question.

Does your BF like all your friends? Or is he just "playing along" sometimes.

 

In every relationship, or friendship for that matter, there are persons who you like and persons you don't like (so much). It's just all about giving and taking. It's something like work. Often there are one or two colleagues who you don't like (so much). But you'll just have to work with them.

This is as much true in a relationship.

 

So think it over. Is it really worth it, to maybe end a relationship over his friends?

 

Nothing is perfect in life, just work your way around some difficulties with these friends of your BF. It's like earlier reply's:

"Who do you have a relationship with, him or them"?

[sparx]

for your advice