To amber Fire You are stronger than you think you are!

[Marianne]

Dear amber fire i read ur post

 

When i 1st read it i 1st got reminded of myself and i can understand how you feel . 3 years ago i got abused by my 1st bf who i went out for 6 years i was the one who dumped him why because it was killng me inside that i did love him but i had all this hurt inside that he caused that nothing of him erase.he hit me he hurt me force himself on me he would hit me wen i dressed nice and that made me afraid to look pretty and i didnt want to be wiht sum1 like that but i was gutted wear the guy i knew went but i knew i had to get out . leaving him n was tough but deep down i knew that i wasnt happy n couldnt live like that when i dumped him i still did love i guess wot the hard part was those long years with him for 2 years i survied on my own i had other things like my grandad died and i had my grandad hold my hand before he died n i made promise that i would be strong withing things and wouldnt let any1 hurt me i was surpised he said that cause i never really at that time told my family the truth it was only last year unexpectly i told my parents wot happen and why i broke up with my ex but theres one thing i realised is about my ex bf he messed up my realationship with my family and i saw wot abuse does the power to causes and love wouldnt do such a thing .please dont make the mistake i did dont go down the track that made me go thru hell.i have not had another bf since then its not that im afraid or anything its that love is patience n im focusing on myself and my future .2 months ago i woke up feeling happy all this time i felt like i had scar from being abused n that scar isnt on me anymore and ive learnt thru the healing process that you cant fight the way you feeling it takes time to heal from things. i have made a difference in my life following my heart to go to church n givin my heart to god n helping others

Be wise and strong and listen to your heart family is important then a guy and you deserve better

All of us on enotalone are here for you to support you all the way .

Marianne

[robowarrior]

I think you are a couragous woman to dump that guys sorry behindmen.

[Amber Fire]

Thank you for caring and sharing your story with me, Maianne. It reinforces that I can get through this.

 

I didn't metion this in my first post, but the last couple of months my ex started telling me not to wear certain clothes to work. He never hit me for wearing certain things, but he did try to "forbid" me.

 

It's eerie how these abusers have so many common tactics.

[Lita43]

Hi Doll!,

"DO NOT STAY WITH HIM!!!!!"

I was married to an abuser and it was both emotional/mental and physical, so if you ever thought you'd marry someone like that and have kids, then what???

The Leopard doesn't change his spots despite how he might try, so "Get Away Now!!!!"

Get a restraining order if you have to!!!! I had to do it twice!!!

There were times that I thought my ex-husband would kill me and felt very nervous around him all of the time and this is not how a relationship should ever be!!!!

Every woman should have the freedom to have self-esteem/confidence in herself and make her own choices in life!

You can direct your own life and take control of who you are and the things you want to do without anyone telling you if you can or can't.

It's your choice.

Go forth and be brave my Girl! Choose a better guy, cuz you "CAN!!!!"

Take Care and Good Luck!!!!

 

Lita~