Turning mildly shy into outgoing and confident

[silentbutdeadly]

Hi, Im not sure where my other post went but it doesn't matter, how can i get rid of that mild shyness that looms over me I find from this site I've learnt what to say and stuff but. i just can't seem to find that confidence in myself to talk to talk to people that I know but woulden't usally speak to including hot girls. I know ways I should present myself be smiley well groomed and try to relax and say "hi,start a convo with them but it easier said than done. If im reasonably shy guy but willing to go for it, if its the right moment in time e.g( see her on her own in canteen or with a group of friends at break how can confidently approach them and join in the conversation. doing that but how can I put myself out there in a situation like that stay calm and confident about it. ...thanks you!

[Prenkle]

Not sure if this works for everyone. Every time I fear approaching people or rejection, I think first of the opportunities that I may miss by hiding in a corner and doing nothing. I also remind myself that if I don't act, I'll think less of myself at the end of the day. That's usually enough to compel me to act.

 

You have nothing to lose by going up to someone (who's available) and asking them out or talking to them. The worst that can happen is actually not that bad. You actually have a lot to gain through confrontation. You gain confidence and respect for yourself which is priceless.

[robowarrior]

I always say to myself 'they have more reason to be afraid of me , then i off them' , its useless to be afraid ,life is like a boxing game, being afraid of your opponent is usuless because you WILL get hurt. SO might as well go for Gold in your life and kill your opponent which is 'life'

[yeawutever]

Yea, approaching can be hard for some people. You could buy some books that suggest proper approaching techniques, they tell how to start convo. with girls and what to tell him. You might also want to write down some stuff before you actually approach the girl, but don't sweat it too much. You're young, you're only 14, there is still plenty of time. Most important is, just be who you are.

[PocoDiablo]

You need to practice. Start small, so to speak, with other guys. Go up to some random guy and just strike up a conversation and then leave after a while. "Dude, how was your weekend? Any parties coming up? Okay, later." Practice next on average or older women. "Hey, do you know of anything cool to do this weekend? Really? What's that like? What city is that in? Cool, thanks."

 

There's a lot of links on my home page to other sites with similar advice - link removed - go check them out.

 

But basically ... real world practice is where it's at, just start small.

[Caldus]

Words in here will only help you to a certain extent. The rest is up to you getting out there and practice.