I did it again.

[waytoodown]

Hey everyone...

Well, I did it again. It had been a bit more then 5 months or so since the last time I had cut. I just lost control. There's too much stuff going on for me to handle...And I haven't seen my bf all week( I think he wants to break up with me)...

I feel worst right now though...Cutting didn't help as much as it used to I think. I thought I was finally over doing it! Why did I go and do such a stupid thing?!? I'm scared...does this mean I'm gonna start doing it again everytime I feel like this? I don't want to, it was so hard stopping the 1st time...

I don't really know why I'm writting this..guess I just don't know what to do right now....Anyways! thanks for any advice or wtv!

[arwen]

Hey,

 

You stopped before, so you will be able to stop again. It's more difficult than it sounds, I know that. Self-injury is a very destructive behaviour pattern in your life. I think you need therapy to get over this, are you talking to someone?

 

Why do you think your bf wants to break up with you? Are there other things going on that make you feel you need to cut in order to feel better?

 

Take care,

 

Ilse

[AntiLove_SuperStar]

There's nothing bad or stupid about you for doing this. It's a kind of coping mechanism you've got - which you managed to kick before, so you can kick it again, especially as you are older, wiser and stronger now.

 

Get a big sheet of paper and a pen and just note down (messily as you like) what it is thats making you cut. *REALLY* think about this. And go as far into your emotions and fears as you can..what exactly is going on with your boyfriend? How EXACTLY is it making you feel? And .. what could you do about it in a practical sense, if anything?

[AnotherBrokenDoll]

Ok firstly gud job for stopping for so long! And as people have said if you stopped before you can do it again! Id say that the reason it didnt help as uch as it used to or as much as you thought it would is because you got over that you no longer need that in your life! It doesnt need to help you! I hope you dont go back!

goodluck!

[Moon Goddess]

You shouldn't be scared that you went to back to cutting everyone loses control sometimes, it's ok. If you did stop before Congrats it's not easy. Helping used to help you before and now it's not even doing that, whenever you feel like your gonna lose control and cut again., Sit. Take deep, long breaths, think why why do you want to cut, and try to calm yourself( I know it's easier said than done but I'm just asking to try), Think of the people that care about you and that you would hurt by cutting yourself. If your losing control ver a desicion then put it off, try and look at why your losing control and push it away until you are better, stroger. Hope This Helps

[waytoodown]

I think that he wants to break up with me because...well, he started a new job a little while back, and he's changed a lot. Lately, eventhough he knows he's hurting me by doing/saying certain stuff, he still goes ahead and does/says it. I guess it's just his way of acting that makes me feel like that...

 

Also, yes, there are many other things making me cut. I have a lot of stress coming from different things in my life presently, and I can't do anything for any of them ( looking for a new job, exams are starting in a couple of weeks....).

 

Thx for all your advice!

[Moon Goddess]

Well I know there are things that are out of your control that are making you cut,whenever you want to cut think of something else occupy yourself with something else. Like you want to cut just go do school work or get something to eat, call up a friend anythng to get your mind off cutting. The best thing I would do is call a friend that always makes you laugh, when you laugh with that person your mind gets off your problems for a while, that's what i normally do when I want to cut. takes my mind off things.

 

Hope this helps

~MG