Is this normal - not letting myself get attached

[LiveStrong]

Hello Everyone,

 

Ive just come out of a relationship that didnt last very long as i was cheated on, but it made me realise something, for the last 2 relationships ive been in, i havent shed a tear between them upon breaking up, i mean of course ive been slightly annoyed and sum what depressed (They both lasted about 3 or 4 months). I know thats not a lot but id still expect to feel slightly more emotional upon breaking up than i do. But i feel like i dont let myself get too attached to people and i dont like it because it doesnt allow me to have a proper relationship.

 

I dont know why i do it, its not like ive been really hurt in the past or anythin, and its not something that i realise im doing while in the relationship, only after its finished.

 

Any ideas why i do this?

 

Thanks in advance,

LiveStrong

[NJRon]

Aside from making some weird psychological analysis based totally on nothing... have you thought that maybe you just weren't all that into those two girls? Once you find someone you are totally into, you start opening up.

[arwen]

Hey LiveStrong,

 

I think it is normal in respect to your age. Although your post shows a whole lot of maturity, you are very reflective on yourself and I think what you see in your present relationships, is useful material to observe when you would enter a relationship. Ask yourself the following questions: why did you start the relationship, and did you feel like you were in love with the ex partners in the beginning? Is there a moment you can pinpoint when that feeling would disappear? It is normal for the in-love feeling to decrease over time. If it turns out it doesn't transfer to actual love, it's logical that you don't get attached too much.

 

I have analyzed the reasons of relationships that I had in one year, because I thought I was doing something wrong there. I had 3 short relationships in one year, and almost no space between them. Only one of the breakups really caused an actual heartbreak, and of course I was not looking for my heart to be broken, but it is strange to notice how fast I was able to move on and it made me doubt how I had actually felt about these guys. I have concluded that at least in 1 case I entered a relationship because I just wanted the relationship and he was a great friend.

 

I hope this offers some insight for you.

 

Ilse

[friscodj]

Dude, you're in high school right? Live it up man! Wow, if I could go back and do high school all over again...

 

Don't sweat it...I think it will change for you when you meet someone you really dig...and in the meantime...let the hormones flow like water my brother...

[fishrrshortae]

I agree, at 17 it's no surprise, honestly I think when you're a little older you will start to experience true love and caring. Most guys I know (and most of my friends ARE guys!!) have told me that they didn't fall in love for the first time until their 20s..

 

you have time, is what i'm saying