New Relationship a good or bad thing?

[texasman123]

I have recently gotten into a new relationship with a girl after a two month breakup with my ex. It has been great, but I do not see a long term future with her and my ex has been making ovetures lately towards getting back together. What I wonder is that would her finding out that I am seeing someone hurt or help, in general, my chances of getting over that hump where she decides that she made a mistake and wants to come back, or will it push her away? Just in general what are peoples feelings on this?

[kellbell]

Ok...I don't have a problem with people going out and meeting people and having fun but...

 

You should be honest with this new girl about what you are looking for and don't lead her on. Also, your ex maybe sniffing around again because she knows you are with someone else. Do not mistake jealousy for love and wanting to get back together. You have every right to move on and get on with your life and not to worry about your ex.

[octopus]

Ohhh listen texasman...

 

I was THAT girl. My ex was dumped by his exgf that he loved, and then met me. He was flying for a few months when we were together. Then, the exgf decided to get back in his life, and he let go of me in a heartbeat because he wasn't over her while he was with me.

 

What happened? I got screwed in between the two of them.

I ask you, PLEASE, either make you intentions clear to your new GF or don't get in a relationship at all. Do you intentionally want to hurt someone, like you were hurt? Make sure both of you know about each other's feelings and expectations and maybe even tell her you're still thinking of your ex. Don't USE her. Please.Hear me.

[Frangipani]

I am one of those people who did not realise how much I trully loved someone until they were gone. It's been 6 months since he moved on and the feelings that filled my heart when he did have not changed since. Yes, this rush of emotion came when I saw he was getting closer to someone else, but it was not jealousy. Sometimes we need to be prompted to see what we have.In the real world, love ebbs and flows and sometimes we need a jolt to see it is really still there.

 

If you don't have strong feelings of love for this new girl, don't lead her on. Alsol, don't stay with her because you fearbeingalone or hurting her. People are always afraid to have 'no one' it seems. Nothing is guaranteed. But if you still want to try with the ex make sure she is genuine. You need to break it off with the new person but have some time alone, to see if the ex really can wait for you to heal and THEN try again. Don't let her think 'it's in the bag.' Just be strong and stay in control of your situation.

 

I still want another chance, and even if he were single again - would still want it.

[texasman123]

I was brief in my explaination, but I want to add that I really like the new girl I am seeing. I am hesitant about the relationship though because she is 21 (and a senior in college) and I am 27. She makes no mention of it and it seems not to bother her at all, but it makes me think the relationship will not last too long. In that case did I miss my chance with my ex, who I know I love to be with and who is amazing to be with, but just had issues that led to the breakup. I have been good about the NC wqith her and it drove her crazy. I have to say that I know she has no idea about my new relationship and that is my worry. If she finds out will that make her just say "ok, i'm done; i need to move on"?