Give me time and space....

[dreamweaverdude]

Ok, after a week and a half of NC after she dumped me.... the 'ex' GF messages me today via yahoo and we chat for literally maybe a minute and then she ends by saying

 

Well good luck ... just give me time and space... gotta go

 

 

I've heard that phrase a many time.... and i know every 'case' is different.. so come on girls you tell that to a guy..what does it mean to you?

[honeyspur]

I myself have never said this to a guy unless I feel he is coming on too strong.

But also, this girl you're talking about may actually not know how to tell you that. Or, it may be the opposite and she may be trying to not get serious. She might want to date freely. I don't think there is any way to tell an ex that. There is just too much fear of hurting that person.

That's my take on it. Good luck.

[Nathalie1970]

Maybe she is using that as a way to keep you as her fall back guy. Give her the time and space that she needs, you may surprise yourself and not want her back if she does return.

 

good luck

[jl301]

I agree with what Nathalie says and that start the NC and don't break this time. If she wants time and space then give it to her. I'm know that you really disappointed right now, but be strong for yourself. Don't be her crutch to lean on from time to time.

[dreamweaverdude]

Natalie,

 

I never relaly thought about it that way. I"ve never been anyone's 'fall back guy', but you know she did say when she dumped me... that maybe in 3-4 months we'd see how things are......... so maybe that is what she meant. Who knows..... i know i still care for her..

 

jl301, i admit i'm the one finding it very hard to NC. I've not smothered her at all since she dumped me, but i have sought out answers.... with nothing but NC in return, until today.

 

So having been out of the 'dating scene' for a long time.... just confused is all.

[Bethany]

The only time I would use that is if I had been hurt by him and needed time to center myself and think about what has happened and decide where I should go from there.And I certainly I wouldn't use it on someone I am completely sure of, I'd be by their side 100%.

 

Saying that I know that others use 'space' as they are scared of committing and 'runaway' to the so-called greener grass to make sure that they are doing the right thing.

I know that if that happened to me, I wouldn't sit around waiting, I would seek greener grass too and it would be their loss if I found someone new in that meantime.